**GETTING
OFF THAT TRAIN**
PART 1
Buffy stopped in front of a shop and looked at the shoes exposed in the window. She needed a lot of stuff but yet she’d only been window shopping ever since she’d stepped into the mall.
It had been so long since she had been on a real clothes shopping. Her favourite pair of boots had a hole under it. That was to say.
She looked at her reflection in the window, her hair was rather light brown now than blonde. Shopping, hair dresser… Those were the things she wasn’t doing so much anymore, as much by lack of time as by lack of desire.
But coming here in Seattle for this soon-to-be-apocalyptic-problem enabled her some time to visit and just relax.
She still had an hour before the closing of the stores. She’d go back at it the next day probably if she didn’t have time to finish today, maybe Willow would come with her if she’d finished with Giles’ research.
Buffy was very daydreamy as she resumed her walking.
She walked by a small casino in a corner, thinking it looked a little shady. She was still very much in her thoughts when suddenly someone bumped into her.
“Oops sorry Mi- B?” Faith’s eyes widened as she recognized the older slayer. She didn’t know how to react, if she should be happy, just surprised or worried.
“Faith??” Buffy smiled all of a sudden.
Faith even frowned at how wide Buffy’s smile was.
“Faith, what are you, oh whatever it’s so good to see you.”
Buffy pulled Faith in her arms.
Faith hugged her in return though she still looked puzzled by Buffy’s delight over seeing her. It was a first. But Faith relaxed and smiled since she could, indeed, truly read pleasure in Buffy’s eyes.
“What- what are you doing here? Is there like a big threat or something? Were you looking for me?”
“No, I mean yes. I mean, big threat and all, the usual, you know. And no, I had absolutely no idea you were here. Are you, do you work here?”
Buffy pointed out the casino’s staff door from which Faith had just gotten out before bumping into her.
Faith nodded, “Security, bouncer if you prefer. Just finished my shift. I’m usually working night shift but… anyway, boring details, shitty job I know but hey, gotta pay the bills.”
“No, no, it’s cool. Do you still slay?”
Buffy smiled at herself by the look Faith gave her.
“Like I’d ever want to stop? Not Sunnydale but keeps me busy enough. And even without supernatural threats I happened to stop some street muggers, couples of times. See, still on the good side, yay for me.”
Buffy couldn’t help but smile.
“I love the hair.”
Buffy raised her eyebrows, “Liar.”
“No, really. I do.”
“You’re kidding me, right? Haven’t had a perm in months, my hair’s like... natural color?! And check out my nails, and my jeans are a couple years old already.”
Faith laughed ever so lightly, “Boy you haven’t changed.”
Buffy shrugged, “Well, actually I did cause, I’m telling you this but… I don’t really care in fact.”
“No?”
“I swear.”
“You’re kidding me, right?”
Buffy smiled at Faith’s teasing frown.
Buffy took a deep breath, she felt immensely good at that moment. It felt as if she’d just found back her best childhood friend; it was weird to think it was Faith she was talking about but yes; seeing her made her feel really good inside.
“Look, do you have like a minute or more even? We could like, have a drink or something?”
Faith still looked uncertain, “B, you sure you want to?”
“Yes, I’ve always wondered what you were becoming, you know. It’s been six years; I kept asking Giles if he heard from you, you know.”
“Wow, you mean you were actually concerned about me? And I don’t mean this in a bitchy way.”
Buffy nodded, “Well, yes I was. And I am glad to see you today.”
“Well, cool. I mean, didn’t get the impression you really liked it when I was there. And again, sorry if that sounds bitchy.”
“No I know but…” Buffy exhaled almost like a pout, “It was a long time ago. Comes a time you just get tired of holding grudges and being mad all the time. So yes, seriously, I’d like to have a coffee with you or just talk and know what you’ve been up to these past couple of years.”
Faith smiled though Buffy didn’t fail to notice the tense veil that spread on her face at the last bit of Buffy’s sentence.
Faith looked at her watch then back at Buffy, “Well, there’s this place downstairs, they serve great coffee there. I can’t stay too long but we can go now if you want.”
“Sure, show me.”
“Ok.”
The slayers walked down to the first floor and settled in a little coffee shop.
“How long have you been living here?”
“A couple of years.”
“Why did you never call Giles or… anyone?”
“Well, I… I guess I wanted to but…. Didn’t get the nerve.”
“Wow, Faith Lehane didn’t get the nerve to do something? You’ve changed too.”
Faith smiled, ”No I… I guess things got in the way and then… Then Angel…. I didn’t feel like it anymore. Thought it was better that way.”
“I get that.” Buffy said, lowering her gaze only a little.
Angel’s death wasn’t supposed to be a bad memory. He was only supposed to be a good memory. She’d mourned enough after his and Spike’s death in a battle she was not even invited in. Somehow they had the best death they could. They both loved her, she loved them but now she’d moved on, was what they’d both wanted of her. So she’d forced herself to only keep the good memories and not mourn.
“But you… what…. How’s everybody? How’s Dawn?”
“Oh my God. She’s off too good. She just got engaged.”
“Really?”
“Yep. She’s been dating Danny for almost five years and now she’s getting married this winter. See that, her first real boyfriend and she stuck to him; that’s how I know she’s not my real sister.” Buffy joked.
“I don’t know, B. I was there only a couple of days last time in SunnyD and she managed to pissed me off quite a few times actually so to me, she really is.”
“Thanks.” Buffy gave her the most sarcastic gaze she could but they both laughed lightly.
“What about Giles, Red and Xan man?”
“Giles is good, he got married 2 years ago with one of the teacher at the slayer’s academy. Haven’t really found a good name for it yet. Oh yes I didn’t tell you, Giles kind of took back the council’s management. Made sense I guess. It’s not as big an institution as it used to be but it’s slowly getting back to it. The slayers are more involved in it so it’s a plus. And Giles’ running it so… no problems. Xander, he’s alright, he got married, yeah I know, they all caught the wedding bug, so Xander, married one year ago to Tina. She’s really great. Willow, well, Willow, what can I say? You won’t be surprise if I tell you she and Kennedy aren’t together anymore.”
“Nope.”
“But you might be surprise if I tell you ken’s actually one of my best friend, or, my best friend in fact.”
“What?? Wow, is it like a parallel universe?”
Buffy smiled, “Seriously, we get along really fine now. I just got back from a mission in Canada with her and it was kind of a blast. She’s super cool when you know her. And, she doesn’t have much to prove now, you know. She’s herself and she’s pretty cool. And guess who’s Willow’s honey now? Kendall, Kennedy’s half sister.”
“Wow, that must be explosive between the three of them.”
“Not even, you wouldn’t believe it but Will and Ken are tighter now than they were when they were together. They’re like best of best friends, really I swear. And Kendall… well, she’s a bit of a challenge in her own way. She’s in charge of most of the paper work with Giles. She was an accountant or something. She’s special… But I’ve learnt to be more patient before judging people cause frankly, if anyone would have told me I’d go hiking with Ken on my free weekends? I’d have laughed, and then smacked their faces hard.”
Faith kept smiling, “You bet. Must be fun anyway. I can’t believe you guys are still all together, so close like that. Kuddos.”
Buffy looked briefly sad, “It hasn’t always been like that. After Sunnydale, well, honestly we split. It’s like we all chose to go in like the exact opposite direction the others were going. We ended up being dispatched all around the world. Xander met his wife in the Republic of South Africa. The girls travelled in South America. We came to Europe Dawn and I while Giles kept going to and fro England and Cleveland, the other Hellmouth. That’s where he’s had the new council’s HQ built. In the area nearby town actually, it was a wild field now it’s a huge training camp. He’s the only one who didn’t take a break. He’s Giles. I myself was seeing this more as a definite stop than a break I must say. I registered Dawn in high school and she did great in Europe. I’ve let her graduate and go to college there even after I came back. No way would she have followed me with Danny there anyway. The girls are the first one who came back. Ken told me one day she was the one getting on edge. Willow was enjoying this time off, she’d kind of think of it as a definite time off too but… Kennedy was a slayer too now. No way would she leave this life behind. I think that’s one of the main thing that stood between them, this and the fact they have absolutely nothing in common of course. It’s cool cause I can tease them with this now, they know it. Kennedy even jokes about it. Anyway, Xander was the next one to come and he didn’t come back alone as I told you. He only came back though because Giles offered him a great job at supervising the construction of the HQ, but then he stayed because… because he IS part of the team. We can’t really work without him and he felt it. He felt it truly was his place, I guess. I don’t think I would have come back knowing he wasn’t there, you know.”
Faith nodded, “He’s one hell of a man. And I’m glad he’s found someone else, you know. He’s moved on.”
“Me too, plus like I said, Tina; really great. Oh my God I didn’t tell you, they have two boys; twins. They’re so… no ok, they’re little devils but still, cute.”
Faith laughed ever so lightly but Buffy felt her tense somehow.
“So, what about you, B? When did you come back to the gang? Can’t really be the gang without you in it.”
Buffy smiled a tense smile, “It was hard; I didn’t want to. I mean, I wanted to but not… It’s… When I said we all split up after Sunnydale, I really mean it. No calls, no letters. Giles was the only one in contact with all of us. I guess Will and Xander called each other a few times cause… who could ever separate them too long? They’ve been best friends all their life. But, otherwise it was like…. I was like, done with all this. I wanted my life and… the things that happened recently had led me to think that it wasn’t in their presence, you know.”
Faith lowered her gaze, “I get that. You know I’m still sorry about that.”
Buffy frowned.
“Throwing you out of the house.”
Buffy swallowed, both by the honest tone in Faith’s voice and by the fact that it was indeed what had been the most hurting time of her life.
“All I wanted was to help. God I never wanted this to go that way. I never wanted you out of the house. I-“
“Faith, Faith it’s ok. Besides I know that because you told me. Do you have any idea what it meant to me that you, you of all people, came out to try and get me back, to try and explain, to try and make it better. You couldn’t at the time because back then I guess I wished it was Dawn or Giles, you know. But it couldn’t be them. They’ve never been as close to me as you are. They can’t know.”
Faith swallowed and looked a bit surprised.
“I mean it, all of them they can’t know. The slayers, they’re so numerous now, so surrounded, so everything we were not. We shared something none of them will ever know. As bad and hard as our lives were at the time, it was something of an intensity they can never grasp… And you were the only one who could feel this. It’s too bad I never really understood that before. It took me a while but anyway, that’s why I’m telling you that I’m really glad to see you again. Cause now honestly, all this is a good memory. You’re a good memory to me, Faith, as weird as it sounds. It’s like my best friend came back to town. And hey, I think I just understood why I get along so well with Kennedy now. She kind of reminds me of you… in a way….”
“Wow, I just switched from mortal enemy to best friend?”
Buffy smiled, “We never were mortal enemies. And, well, close friend I’d say. It’s just… I’ve sort of left the pain and suffering Sunnydale have been in a place that’s locked you know, past. And you were close to me in a way I don’t need to explain so yes, I’m happy to find this back.”
Faith seemed speechless.
Buffy raised her eyebrows, “I do lots of thinking at nights.”
“I see that.”
They smiled at each other.
“But only, Faith; I had never thought about all this like that. I…. It just came out like that when I saw you. It’s weird.”
“Well, I guess it’s a good thing. I’m glad you’re feeling ok. You do look good or quiet or, whatever the word is, you do look wiser or something.”
“Closer to thirty now. Well, ok, still a couple of years but I feel it coming. About time to be wiser. So enough talking about me, how about you?”
“Me, same old same old.”
“Come on, I just told you a bunch of stuff.”
“Well, you’ve always been a chatterbox.”
Buffy smiled but kept an insisting look on Faith.
“Nothing much, seriously, B. So, all getting married and stuff, what about you? Boyfriend?”
“God you haven’t changed a bit on that, Faith. You still don’t share anything about you.”
“See, you’ve got me all figured out already.”
“Well, the Hell with that. I bet lots happened in these six years but you’re just too much yourself to think it’s worth saying.”
“You were the chatty one, always have been. Or not so much in fact when it comes to boyfriends talk. So, you didn’t reply, B.”
“Why do you wanna know?” Buffy asked a bit on the defensive.
“Wow, I knew old Buffy wasn’t far.”
Buffy raised her eyebrows innocently, “Hey, I didn’t become the voice of wisdom, you know; I’m still me. I just don’t see things the same way, and I don’t refuse to talk about my private life with you at all. I just wish you would do the same that’s all.”
Faith lowered her gaze briefly but the expression on her face stayed still.
“But anyway, well, I briefly dated some guy called The immortal back in Italia. Don’t give me that look; yes, he wasn’t exactly human. But it was just a fling though I must say, definitely worth the time. It did cost me a bed and a table though. But man was he good.”
Faith almost spat her mouthful of coffee, ”Wow B. You did change.”
“Come on, 28 there, talking about sex is far from the most embarrassing topic for me, believe me.”
Faith couldn’t help but smile.
“So anyway, I kind of stopped this after… well, after the apocalypse in LA.” a.k.a after the souled vampires’ death.
“I stayed single for a while until I got back at the academy three years ago.”
Buffy lowered her gaze a little.
“What’s his name?” Faith directly asked.
“Matthew.” Buffy replied honestly, “We broke up 6 months ago. It’s my longest relationship to date.”
“What happened?”
“Well, a bit of history repeats on this one. Riley-history. I mean he was nice, a bit more difficult to make out than Riley was, and I certainly did put more of myself in this relationship than I did with Riley. But in the end it turned out just the same. Well, ok he didn’t leave the country in a day but he’s currently in Europe, operating for the council from there. Germany I believe. Wow, I’m really great with these relationship things huh? I did try to make it work but... I don’t know, there was something missing, always.”
“Fangs?”
Buffy threw her plastic spoon at Faith who couldn’t help but laugh.
Buffy smiled nicely too, “I don’t know what it was, what it is, well I do but I’m not sure what this word means; passion.”
“I see.”
“So here I am. Single and actually enjoying it. So-“
Buffy was interrupted as Faith’s cell phone rang.
PART 2
Faith didn’t seem delighted when she looked whose call it was from, “Excuse me.” She just told Buffy and turned around slightly on her chair,
#Yeah. At the mall why? Yes I did, no I’m not. Ok stop yelling or I hung up ok?? I ran across an old friend. A friend. Screw you. No it’s not, yes I’m at the mall!! It’s Buffy, yes, yes Buffy Summers, do you know anyone else with that name? Yeah that’s because you’re acting like one. No I swear. Soon. I don’t know when. Soon, that’s all. Yeah, later.#
Faith sighed.
Buffy raised her eyebrows, “So, there IS someone waiting at home then.”
“Yeah.”
“Who would have bet? Faith Lehane settling before me. Things do change.”
Buffy stayed serious then as she saw Faith’s smile hadn’t come back on her lips.
“I’m afraid I’m gonna have to go now, B.”
“Yeah sure, I understand but err, who is it?”
“Who?”
Buffy pointed out the cell phone.
“Oh, no one.”
“Well, that’s a no one who knows me apparently so…”
“What? Oh, yes, err,” Faith looked embarrassed a little.
Buffy kept staring at her expectantly.
“It’s err, Robin.”
“Robin? Oh you mean, Robin as in Robin Wood, as in principal wood, as in Sunnydale’s robin?”
Faith nodded.
“Wow. And I was like proud cause I stayed with the same guy 2 years and a half. Who would have thought? I mean I knew you could do this, settle with someone like that, just… not right now… You’ve been together all this time?”
“It’s complicated.”
“You know it used to be my middle name. Come on, hit me.”
Buffy could see that Faith wasn’t really eager to go on that talk, but she could definitely see that Faith wanted to stay with her at this moment despite it all.
“Come on, tell me.”
Faith smiled, ”God you still know how to do that.”
“Do what?”
“This pout of yours that gets you everyone and everything.”
“Don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Faith smiled, ”Alright, well no, we did not stay together all this time. I kind of followed him after Sunnydale cause frankly, I had nowhere else to go. I mean you all bailed which I can totally understand. Things weren’t set with the police and all. I stayed in contact with Giles for that, I mean cause he told me he’d tried, you know. In the meantime, I couldn’t do much, and Robin stayed with me. We fooled around, you know. Honestly I wasn’t into him, I mean he was great but you know me. I wasn’t into being with someone at the time but we’d kind of made this stupid deal and he… kinda clung to it anyway. Honestly I kept doing my things, more and more even when he started complaining about it like he owned me, you know. I… Well, I hate to admit it but I kind of needed him in the sense I needed a place to stay, money and stuff… And I guess I kind of led him on. At the time I guess… I… well, I guess that’s called cheating. But I didn’t consider myself really being with him, you know so I didn’t see it like that. But then… things changed, you know….”
“Huh huh.” Buffy seemed unconvinced.
“Ok I gotta go now, B.”
“Yes, yes, I… Look, could we see each other again? I’d really like that.”
“Really?”
Buffy gave her a huge smile, ”How many times do I have to say it? Yes, really.”
“Ok, well, err, I’m not working tomorrow but, err, Saturday we can hang out here if you want before my night shift.”
“Ok, yes, or, we could also patrol together. Since you’re not working tomorrow night, means you’re free for patrol maybe?”
“No actually, Robin has this teacher’s meeting in the evening so I gotta stay home to… do stuff. He’s the principal in Seattle High.”
Faith got up.
Buffy did the same.
“Oh, ok. Well, Saturday then. That’d be cool.”
“Ok. Tell everyone I said hi and I’m glad they’re ok.”
“Actually it’s just Giles, Will and I for a starter. Ken just left, she had appendicitis and had it removed so Giles sent her back to rest at the academy. Man she was so pissed.”
“I bet she was.”
“But anyway, I’ll tell them. And say hi to Robin for me.”
“I will.”
“Oh and B. If your apocalyptic shit really gets apocalyptic, you can count me in, ok?”
“I will, same for you if you ran into more trouble like this.”
“Huh?” Faith frowned.
Buffy pointed out Faith’s bruised cheek.
“If I can do anything.”
“Oh no, it’ll be gone tomorrow.”
Buffy smiled, “This I know, but I meant about the demons or vampires who did this.”
“Oh. It’s... taken care of already, don’t worry.”
“Ok. Well, I’ll see you on Saturday then, oh err, what time?”
“Well, I start at 8 so err, let me think. I think I can get free by say 6?”
“6, ok. In front of the coffee or the casino?”
“Coffee.”
“Cool then.” Buffy smiled.
“Well, I was glad to see you Buffy.”
“Really?” Buffy sarcastically told her with a fake disbelieving tone.
Faith smiled lightly, “Right. Keep joking. Anyway, glad you’re feeling like this toward…. stuff I did and stuff…”
Buffy gave her a genuine smile, “It’s time to get off the guilt trip train, Faith. Let it go already. You’ll feel better. Honestly I do.”
“I’ll try to think about that.”
Buffy smiled and they waved good bye then walked their own way.
~
Buffy and Willow were sitting around a table, reading some new books Giles had just gotten about their demon threat.
Buffy seemed more focused on a crack in the wall than on the page she was supposedly reading.
“She seemed different.”
Willow smiled but didn’t quit her gaze off of her reading. She didn’t comment either.
“I mean not so much in fact. Well, 6 years, almost. She’s matured of course, I mean physically. I mean already for the fight against the First she’d changed, her body I mean. She wasn’t a teenage girl from like high school when we met her.”
Willow turned her page casually.
“Well in fact she hasn’t changed that much from that time, physically speaking. I mean the final fight time. She’s... her hair is a bit shorter is all. But she’s changed, mentally speaking I mean. Of course I didn’t get to talk to her that much but... she’s changed. Or maybe I just- what?” Buffy stopped as she noticed Willow was laughing low while still reading.
“What’s up, Will? What are you laughing at?”
Buffy stretched out her head as if to look at Willow’s book but the witch closed it.
“You, Buffy. You’re way too funny sometimes.”
“Wow thanks. Like your honesty.”
Willow kept on smiling, “She’s changed, she hasn’t changed but she has changed in a way but there’s another way in which she hasn’t changed but maybe she has in fact... You’re so funny rambling about her like that.”
“I’m not rambling.”
“Buffy, you’ve been back for,“ Willow looked at the clock, “3 hours now and I know the very details of your 30 minutes with her by heart.”
Buffy was about to speak when she realized she had nothing to say about that; it was true.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to bother you. I just think it was nice, seeing her again, you know.”
“You’re not bothering me, Buffy. I just think it’s cute.”
“Cute?”
“Yeah cute. When you’re all excited over something, your rambling gets really cute.”
“I’m not all excited. Come on, haven’t seen her in years; I didn’t even know if she was still alive. It’s good to run into old friends like that. Brings back memories.”
Willow gave her the most sceptic look she could.
“Come on, Will, don’t be like her. It’s past. We’ve all done things we’re not proud of and we don’t feel pity for ourselves all day long about it anymore. What’s past is past.”
“Yeah I get that, but it’d be hypocrite to call her a friend, still. I mean honestly I’ve been over what she did a long time ago, but I wouldn’t go and say ‘hi Faith, remember when we used to be friends?’. “
Buffy pouted slightly, “I know, in a way I know but, you won’t believe me but really... I don’t feel any hatred or grudges against her. I’ve seen her and I was just... happy, you know. Ok I know I’m crazy.”
“No, you’re not.” Willow said, resuming her reading, “You and her just didn’t have the same relationship we did. Your history together is a bit more... well, different.”
“I guess... I think, it’s hard to explain.”
“You’re slayers, Buffy. And it’s obviously a slayer thing what with the way you get Kennedy better than I ever could.”
“Not sure about that part but... I guess, maybe, probably.”
“And with Faith and you it’s even stronger because it started way before. It was always intense between you, that it was hate or love.”
“Wow, wow wait, love, you mean friendship?”
Willow looked at Buffy with a sheepish grin.
Buffy sighed and closed her book, “God I’m going to kill her.”
“Please don’t be mad at her, Ken didn’t mean to say it, it just slipped.”
“Well, first there is no *it* to say because if she told you the entire truth your ex-girlfriend is the one who thinks I have/had a crush on Faith, not me. Never said anything like that.”
Willow smiled, ”Well, first she didn’t say crush... she rather used the word passion and-and it’s true, Buffy. You very passionately tried to kill her. Can’t say Kennedy is wrong on that one?”
“Very funny.”
Buffy looked sad for a brief moment at that memory.
Willow closed her book once again, “Yes, she used the word passion and I think she’s not totally wrong, and for both of you. This isn’t something I did not witness, Buffy. I was there, remember? That it was love, anger, hatred, desire or fights; it was all very passionate between you two. Faith really cared and worried for you. I could see it when she sent us to look for you after we....” Willow lowered her head, that night had left huge scars in the entire gang even if things had gone back to normal, their relationship had never returned the same.
But she admitted to herself that they were maybe better now.
Buffy put her hand above Willow’s which got the witch out of her thoughts,
“You know I’m glad to be back, Will. I’m glad we’re all still friends and close together. I know things are different, Kennedy’s closer to a best friend to you than I am, and she’s that to me too somehow, but I don’t regret anything cause here I am, talking to you. And we do that; talk, a lot. We talk now more than we ever did the last years in Sunnydale. And I like that. I like what we’ve become.”
“Me too.”
The two friends smiled at each other then regained their seriousness.
“So, Faith. You’re meeting her Saturday, right?”
“Yep, wish I could see her tomorrow. It’s weird how eager I feel.”
Willow smiled and Buffy gently tapped her shoulder, “Just to talk as friends, because I’ve missed her, as a friend.”
“Huh-huh. Sorry Buffy but, you and her; you were never friends.”
“Ok, right fine. But now we are, or... are going to be. I mean I’d like that.”
“Not more?”
“God Will, Kennedy really has a bad influence with you.”
Willow smiled, ”No but I mean... it’s like a second chance... or a third but well, with The First and all, kinda spoilt that one plus... Anyway, what I meant is... we’re going to leave Seattle, maybe sooner than planned if the threat turns out to be a regular one. So what then? How does it make you feel to leave her behind, again?”
Buffy stayed silent for a while, “I kind of... don’t like that idea. Wow, what’s going on with me?”
“Buffy I... Yes, you’ve moved on with your life and it’s great, we all did and things are quite good... I’m glad that you’re not so withdrawn in yourself like you used to be. You’ve got Kennedy, you’ve got me, Dawn when she’s here and you have these great talks with Giles too but... you’re still lonely, deep down. I know it, Kennedy knows it and we can’t really fill that gap... I believe that... Well, I can never know what it’s like to be a slayer. I’ve watched you and Kennedy enough to know I really can’t know, never. It’s like there’s something there that’s for slayers only... But still, you among them, you’re different... Maybe it’s because you were The one or maybe it’s something else but... you’re still alone in a way... We can all see it in your eyes and we can’t change it, you’re Buffy. This is how you are but maybe... Well, when I hear you talk about Faith which is what I’ve been doing for three hours now so I should know, anyway when you do, you have, yes here’s that word again; passion. There’s a passion that’s coming back to the surface and you look... Yeah you look happy, deep down. So I’m thinking... maybe you don’t want to leave her behind because you shouldn’t....”
Buffy looked deep in thoughts then she sighed, “Yeah, but she’s got Robin... Been together for a while apparently.”
“Yeah and she’s not happy with him.”
Buffy frowned.
Willow raised her eyebrows, “3 hours, Buffy.”
“Oh. I’ve really been talking that much about her?”
“Buffy, I know the brand of her cell phone, the number of holes in her ears and the best; she wears a pink pantie. God I could tease her to life with that. By the way, how come you were looking that low at a simple friend?”
“Not my fault, saw it briefly when she bent to pick up her cell phone in her bag.”
“And you took off your gaze so fast that you invented the small blue and violet little squares on the side huh?”
Buffy blushed guiltily.
“That was a low cut pants?” Buffy tried then sighed, “Ok, maybe I do have a thing for her.”
“Maybe.” Willow confirmed.
“But it’s not, it doesn’t mean-“
“Hey Buffy, we’re not in high school anymore. It doesn’t have to mean anything, or just simply that... you both have a history that’s not over, simply. Maybe you need to see her and talk just to have some closure, I don’t know. Or maybe it’s deeper than this. All I know is that you need her in some way that I, or you, can’t really define for now. And it’s cool cause according to this book, we’re not leaving Seattle any day now. We might have to call on the cavalry sooner than planned.”
“Really?” Buffy moved closer.
That was another thing that had changed about her, no matter what personal matters was going on, when the mission called, nothing else mattered.
“Yep, those are the demons, not the joking kind apparently. We can expect trouble.”
“Ok, let’s go see Giles, hey wait,”
Buffy said as they both got up, “So, that’s real trouble then? That would be worth showing unexpectedly at somebody’s door, somebody who offered their help in case of big trouble, right?”
Willow smiled; yes Buffy had changed, but she was still so Buffiesque. Plus what’s more, she wasn’t wrong so...
“Well, yes Buffy, might be a case of showing at somebody’s door when said somebody’s boyfriend is out of the house tomorrow for a teachers’ meeting, for example? So that’ll leave more room to... explain the big trouble.”
“I’m with you on that.”
“I’m sure you are.”
The two friends left the room to go see the man in charge and report the news.
Willow, later that night, found Faith’s address in the suburbs. The house was at Robin’s name.
PART 3
Buffy called Seattle High to make sure she wouldn’t be late at the teachers meeting she was attending. She therefore learnt it didn’t start before 6. And that’s exactly the time she showed up in Faith’s neighbourhood then.
She was walking in the street their house was supposed to be on.
One thing hadn’t changed about Buffy, she hated driving. She did have her license but avoided to take a car as much as she could. So she’d come by bus. The bus stop wasn’t more than half a mile from Faith’s house.
“94, 95, 96...” she slowly counted, looking at the neighbourhood’s gardens, for those who had some. Those were nice little houses. And it seemed a quiet neighbourhood.
“97, there you are.” Buffy looked at the nice little house, not very big but for a couple, seemed ok. There was a small garden in the front and...
Buffy frowned, “Will, must have gotten the number wrong.”
Buffy checked at the address on her paper and once again stared at the sight in front of her. On the floor, close to the door was spread a wide cover with a couple of toys and a teddy bear on. Toys definitely belonging to the little girl playing with them.
Buffy rubbed her forehead briefly then looked at the little girl and couldn’t help but move closer.
Wood was indeed the name on the mailbox of the house. Buffy opened the small portal. She told herself Willow had probably come across another Robin Wood until... until she locked eyes with the young girl’s gaze.
Buffy knelt close to the beautiful mix-raced little girl, “Nope, you’re definitely hers.”
Buffy looked up as she knew Faith was staring at her from the top of her porch’s stairs now.
Buffy got up and smiled, “Couldn’t mix those eyes with anyone else’s.”
Faith smiled at her then and walked the two steps down to pick up the young girl.
Buffy noticed how carefully she took her, and how tenderly she caressed her back and held her tight as she moved closer to Buffy, “Hey, B, meet Cassandra. See that baby, this is... aunty B-Buffy.”
Buffy smiled, “Aunty, B. I kinda like that.”
Faith smiled, she then planted a soft kiss on Cassandra’s cheek. The young girl smiled, “Mommy.” She just said.
Buffy’s heart rose in her chest at the look of pure delight that spread on Faith’s face when her daughter called her.
Faith looked at Buffy and moved Cassandra closer to her for Buffy to hold her. Cassandra looked shy.
“Hey Cassandra. You’re the most beautiful little girl I’ve ever seen, do you know that?”
Cassandra smiled then.
“You’re lucky, B. Usually she starts crying when she doesn’t know the person.”
Buffy raised her eyebrows, “Hum, doesn’t trust easily; wonder where she got that from.”
Faith lightly smiled and gestured to the house, ”Wanna come in?”
“I’d very much like to, yes.”
They walked inside. Faith settled Cassandra in her playpen. She then went to make coffee for Buffy who was sitting in the couch in the meantime.
Faith came back and sat close to the playpen, one hand in it, stroking her daughter’s hair.
“How old is she?”
“Gonna be 4 next december.”
“She’s really beautiful.”
“Hey, she’s mine.”
Buffy smiled, “True, how else could she be? I mean...”
The two slayers looked at each other and smiled...
They stayed silent for a while then.
“Why didn’t you tell me last night?”
“I don’t know, I just... I don’t know honestly.”
Buffy looked at Cassandra and couldn’t help but go to her as the young girl kept staring at her, “Do you want to come in Aunty B’s arms.”
Cassandra giggled, “Aunty B.” She laughed and both slayers laughed at her cute little laugh.
Buffy took her in her arms.
Of course Cassandra immediately turned her head the other way to look for her mother, but once she spotted her then she was all smiling again.
Buffy sat back on the couch with Cassandra on her lap.
“So, B. What brings you in the neighbourhood?”
“Well, we figured out what we were up against and I think we’re going to take you on that offer.”
“Ok. I just need to know where and when so I can, you know, plan.” Faith said with a gentle gaze at her daughter.
“I understand. Well anyway, we don’t know yet. Didn’t find their locations. I just came, well, just wanted to make sure you were still up to it.”
“Yeah, yeah I am, definitely. It’s been a while but honestly, slaying with you; still haven’t found nothing best.”
“Gotta agree with you. I mean I have fun with the other girls but it’s not the same. Except with Kennedy but it’s definitely not the same. We just spend more time laughing than actually kicking the bad guys. She’s always making fun of something I said or did, you know. With you it was... always intense. Different.”
They smiled knowingly at each other.
“So anyway, while I’m here, I can maybe help you with your problem.”
Faith frowned and Buffy pointed out her face.
Faith remembered she had a light black eye. Light because she was a slayer and healed fast.
“Oh that.”
“I can give a hand. Who are those guys? Gotta be pretty tough cause they rarely got close enough to leave bruises like that, that often.”
“No it’s cool. I’ve been a little tired, a little off game lately. That’s why but I’m good now.”
“Really? Cause you shouldn’t go out patrolling then. You might get hurt.”
“You worry for me, B?”
“You know I do. And... I’m sure I’m not the only one.” Buffy glanced at Cassandra who was somehow falling asleep in her arms at this moment.
Faith moved closer, ”It’s really weird, she really doesn’t like being in stranger’s arms. So falling asleep... Wow, that’s kind of a first. She only does that with me.”
“And Robin I guess.”
Faith shook her head, “Not unless she’s really tired. She only falls asleep in my arms otherwise.”
Faith caressed the back of Cassandra’s head. Buffy couldn’t help looking at the love in Faith’s eyes for her daughter.
“I’m gonna put her to bed now.” She slowly whispered.
Buffy let Faith take Cassandra in her arms again. The baby girl was indeed asleep.
Faith stopped mid-stairs and turned around with a smile, ”Do you wanna come?”
Buffy smiled and was already up.
Buffy kept watching Faith and admiring her. As strange as it would have seemed to Buffy to imagine Faith with a baby, actually seeing her so comfortable with one didn’t surprise Buffy at all in fact. It seemed to fit totally. Faith was so gentle, so tender with her daughter. Buffy could feel how much she loved her, how much she was taken care of her like nothing else in the world.
Buffy kept finding herself admiring Faith’s every gesture towards her daughter.
Faith turned the baby monitor on and left with one in her hand so that she could hear everything going on in the room.
The slayers walked back downstairs.
“What do you wanna eat?”
“Oh no, I don’t want-“
“Please, I... I really want you to stay. I mean.”
“Do you have a pizza?” Buffy told her with a smile.
“I do. But I can actually cook some stuff, you know. Robin showed me a couple of recipes and I haven’t burn the house yet.”
Buffy lightly smiled, ”So you and him... It’s really serious huh. It’s good. I mean for you and for Cassandra I guess.”
“Yep.” Faith headed to the kitchen.
Buffy couldn’t help this feeling again of unhappiness in Faith’s eyes at this moment.
They settled for a pizza as first planned.
They were eating and talking about Sunnydale, about the few good moments they’d had there before the madness started. And as they remembered, it ended up there were more than a few.
They were laughing when Robin came back home.
“Oh, hi Buffy.”
“Hi Robin, nice to see you again.”
“Same for me. Even if I had no idea you’d be here.” He said with a colder look at Faith on that.
“Oh it’s my fault, I showed up unexpectedly. Needed to see Faith. Business talk I guess, you know what it is.”
“I do. So business, huh?”
Faith got up, “Yep, they might need me on that one. Trouble’s in town so. Err anyway, I was thinking I might go there directly to see this with Giles in the afternoon, before my shift.”
“Tomorrow afternoon? Who’s gonna look after Cassie?”
“You’re staying home tomorrow. You’ve got your game.”
“Yes exactly, I’m playing cards, watching the game on TV and having a couple of beers with my friends, not really baby sitting type of activites.”
“You’re really doing it on purpose, aren’t you? Look I'll take her to the fair in the morning, she'll be so tired after lunch she'll just sleep through the afternoon; you'll just have to plug the baby monitor, even I can use it so it shouldn’t be too hard for you, mister Principal.”
“Be careful, Faith.” He told her in a tone that almost gave Buffy shivers weirdly.
Faith sighed and looked away, “All I’m saying is it’s one afternoon, ok?”
“And all I’m saying is you said you’d be here. My friends are coming and the house is a mess.”
“No it’s not, besides I’m tired of your friends checking me out. You know Brad keeps hitting on me and you just keep showing me off like a pimp shows his whores.”
“Oh about that, feel free, you know; Brad makes a lot more money than I do.”
“Fuck you, Robin.”
Robin gave Faith a gaze that would freeze the Sahara desert. He walked upstairs without anymore words.
Faith sighed.
“I’m sorry, Faith. I didn’t mean to cause trouble. Honestly we can handle it I think. I mean for now.”
“No it’s cool, B. I don’t get to do much so he’s not going to take that away from me.”
“But-“
“Look I’ll see you tomorrow ok? I’ll call you and tell you if I can come, otherwise we’ll do like we said last night. Meeting there before I start my shift.”
“Ok. I’ll just go back then.”
“Yeah. You’re gonna be ok driving home, won’t get lost?”
“No chances; I came by bus.”
“Oh really? Err, I’ll drive you back then, it’s dark outside.”
“Hey Faith, super girl here, remember? I’ll be fine; I think you should maybe, stay.”
“Well, my truck kinda gave up on me and there’s no way he’s lending me his car keys tonight so... I guess.... You sure you’ll be ok?”
“Don’t worry. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Ok.” Faith waited for Buffy to be at the doorstep, she waved goodbye and walked upstairs.
Buffy closed the door with a bitter feeling.
She walked away slowly, she could hear them arguing already and soon Cassandra started to cry, woken up by the argument of course..
Buffy felt really bad about this.
She talked with Willow about it for a while. The redhead didn’t know what to think about this but she was rather eager to see Faith again. She was somehow interested in the brunette’s new life. Seeing her would also be a pretty good way to tell where she stood with both Buffy and Robin. Willow had become pretty good with sensing people, sensing their auras like Tara used to be. Willow had worked on this side of magic a lot those last couple of years.
Buffy stayed on the phone with Kennedy for the most part of the night. The next morning Kennedy was pissing everyone off even more to accelerate her getting back to Seattle.
Andrew and Kendall were actually thinking about breaking her legs, both of them to get her to stay in her bed, but they’d need even more than that, say break all of her bones to keep her quiet so much she was stubborn. When she had something in mind... No way would she miss this as she told Buffy who of course replied that there would be nothing to miss. Just two old friends getting their friendship back. Buffy heard Kennedy raise her eyebrows over the phone. They’d both smiled and joked for a while then.
It eased Buffy’s mind somehow of her worries for Faith. She wasn’t sure why but she couldn’t help worrying.
Buffy slept in the next morning since she’d gotten to bed so late, or early in fact. She was woken up by Faith calling her. The blonde slayer wasn’t so surprise that Faith cancelled their meeting before her shift.
Buffy told her she understood but it didn’t prevent her from going to the mall, she still had some shopping to do after all... It was just a total coincidence that she happened to be shopping around the casino when Faith got there.
“Hey Faith?!” She called the brunette before she got into by the staff’s door.
“Oh hey, B. I thought-“
“I was doing shopping; wasn’t done the other day. So, how’s it going?”
“Not well if I don’t get in soon, I’m late. And by the way, most shops are closing now. What were you shopping for?”
“Well, in fact, I went to take a snack at the McDonald. I was on my way home in fact.”
“Oh ok. Well, gotta go now. So, err, call me if things get worse with your baddies.”
“Ok.”
Buffy didn’t try to keep her longer.
Faith clearly wasn’t in a friendly mood this morning. Totally different than the previous evening. Buffy had really felt that she was glad to have her there at home and talk to her. Until Robin arrived of course. The atmosphere then had become so tense and somewhat colder than the Antarctica all of a sudden... and Faith had seemed farther, really farther away... She still was this morning.
Buffy didn’t really like to see her like that because she could see this sad gleam she had the day she met her the other night. It wasn’t there last evening when they were talking together.
Buffy checked out her watch.
She knew Faith supposedly finished her night shift at 5 a.m.
Buffy decided to go home but with the firm intention on coming back to pick Faith up after her shift. She knew Faith was currently using public transportation so for once, she would take the car and therefore give Faith a ride home.
That would leave them time to talk a little.
Buffy was back at 4.45 a.m.
She waited in front of the Casino’s main entrance.
She saw the staff’s door opening, a few men and a girl left.
She caught sight of Faith but the brunette was dragged back inside pretty fast.
Buffy hurried as she got scared but she stopped in her track behind the door as she heard talking.
“I can’t, I gotta go.”
“Come on, sexy. Just a little while.”
“Steve I told I couldn’t do this anymore. Plus I gotta get back before he leaves for work.”
“Oh come on, he won’t leave the kid alone in the house, besides, it’s barely five. Won’t leave now. Come on, just a quickie. I have some acid.”
“Right, you want me to get back to my kid wasted? No thanks.”
“I just want you to relax, you’re just so tense these days. Give me half an hour and I can do that for you.”
Buffy heard Faith smile.
She could also hear the sound of kisses.
“Come on, Steve, not here.”
“Let’s go upstairs then.”
Buffy heard the man say before the door closed.
Buffy looked upset, mad a little as well.
She decided to wait.
She settled in the small bakery in front of the casino as it was slowly opening.
PART 4
50 minutes later Faith walked out again.
If she hadn’t looked even sadder than the previous evening Buffy would have just called her out loud from her spot. Instead she got up and walked to meet her.
Faith looked surprised.
“B, hey, err, what are you doing here? Shops aren’t opened yet, you know.” She tried lightly.
“Well, came to give you a ride home actually. Been waiting here for a little while.”
“Yeah, shift got longer today. We gotta lots of people sick these days. Manager really needs us.”
“So that’s who it was; the manager?”
Faith sighed.
“Did you sleep with him?”
“What do you think?”
“Faith what- what are you doing?”
“I knew it wouldn’t take long before judgmental Buffy comes back.”
“I’m not judging I’m just... I don’t understand...”
“Nothing to understand. I gotta go now before he leaves Cassie to the neighbours.”
“Could’ve thought of that earlier while banging the guy.”
Buffy found herself pinned against the wall hardly, “Don’t you dare judge me on that level, B. I’d do anything for my baby.”
Faith let go of Buffy because of the quiet, somehow soothing gaze Buffy gave her then.
Buffy didn’t try to respond to the violent attack and didn’t seem mad at it.
“I know. I could tell that the first minute I saw you looking at her, that’s why I want to help. I just don’t understand why you would do something like that, and risk hurting her.”
“It’s the only way I can stand it.”
“Stand what, Faith?”
“Nothing. Look, B, we’re not in Sunnydale anymore, you’re not the guardian Angel. You can’t fix everything. Cassie’s fine. I’m fine, we’re all fine. I’m living my life the best way I can. It’s maybe not perfect but it’s my life. And if you can’t accept this then don’t come around cause I won’t stand it. This is how it is.”
Faith started walking away.
“Faith, wait.”
Faith stopped.
“My car’s parked over there in lot C. This way.” Buffy gestured the opposite way.
“B, I-“
“I got you. Your life; I won’t say anything. Please, let me bring you home.”
Faith followed her then.
They settled in the car. They were silent first.
“Do you love him? That, that guy.”
Faith didn’t flinch, “You know me better than this, Buffy.”
“What about Robin?”
Faith stayed silent.
“Sorry.” Buffy said, “Won’t ask anything else.”
Faith sighed casually, “You probably will at some point.”
They looked at each other.
“I know you well, Buffy.”
Buffy smiled at her but then looked back at the road.
She didn’t ask anything else for the rest of the way though.
“Are you sure you’re gonna be ok?”
“Yeah, don’t worry.”
Faith opened the passenger’s door.
“Faith, I’d... I’d really like to see you again, I mean talk, about anything you want, or just hang, or hey we could go patrol together.”
Faith seemed hesitant, “I don’t know, B.”
“I promise I won’t ask anything personal. I-.. I really like being with- talking to you.”
“I know, I... But I don’t think seeing you is really good for me. I mean, I always seem to fuck up more when you’re around so... Not sure it’d be a good idea.”
“And why is that? According to you, Faith?” Buffy quietly asked her.
The slayers stared at each other intensely for a long moment.
“I gotta go.” Faith closed the door gently.
Buffy sighed but slowly started her engine again.
~
A knock on Buffy’s door.
“Come in.”
Willow opened the door, “Wow, didn’t see that look on your face in a long time.”
“No I’m fine. I’m just... thoughtful.”
“Yeah, that’s what I was saying.”
Willow sat on her friend’s bed, “Ok, maybe those news will cheer up your mood. Giles thinks we might have gotten alarmed a tad fast. Those demons aren’t preparing an apocalypse, only just raising their kinds, which in time, when they’re numerous enough might lead them to try and bring forth the apocalypse, but he says we should get rid of them pretty fast before they’ve raised their army.”
“Great, so I’m going to be leaving here soon and never get the chance to talk to her again. Real great news, Will.”
Buffy then looked at Willow who was still staring at her with a nice smile.
“Sorry, Will. Yes it is great news.”
“Don’t worry, I kinda knew this wouldn’t really cheer up your mood, but I still have this in my pocket, or behind the door actually. Time for the big gun.”
Buffy frowned until she saw Kennedy standing at the door step.
“Hey what’s up super girl?”
“Hey!”
Buffy was already on her feet and the two girls hugged each other tightly.
Buffy then pulled away and tapped her on the shoulder, “Dammit, you just got your appendicitis removed, what on earth are you doing here?”
“Come on, we’re gonna get these beasties down. You didn’t seriously think I’d let you have all the fun? Plus Willow told me you kept whining about that hot chick of yours so I thought... I should save my fav witch from that.”
“Ok first, I’m not whining, secondly she’s not my hot chick. And third, I’m so glad you’re here.”
They hugged each other tightly again then Kennedy moved to the bed rather slowly. She usually would jump on it but she still had bandages on her stomach so...
She knew Buffy, as well as willow, would send her back in the minute if they saw that it was still hurting a little.
“So, what’s the problem? Is it still the principal or that other guy?”
Buffy frowned.
“Willow told me about him.”
“Oh.” Buffy settled on the bed and Willow left the room to go back to Giles.
Nothing better than a Kennedy talk for Buffy to find her smile back.
“No it’s, he’s just... He’s just a fling I guess. She just, she didn’t seem like she was into this kind of behaviour anymore. I know I don’t mean to be judgmental and honestly I’m not. I wouldn’t mind.”
“I know you wouldn’t cause I keep having flings myself and you’ve never been judgmental.”
“I know, with the things I’ve done in the past, can’t really judge anyone on that level. But it’s just... It bothers me because... She doesn’t seem happy. And I know she does that because she is not happy. She’s.... There’s something that I don’t know and it’s bugging me cause I... God I don’t know anymore.”
“You just don’t want to see her unhappy.”
Buffy lowered her face.
“Hey Buffy it’s me.”
Buffy stared at her, ”I don’t want to leave this town. I don’t want to leave... I... Ever since I saw her... Ok go ahead say it, you’re going to say it anyway.”
Kennedy smiled, “What? I told you so. Not gonna say it, ok I guess I did but, what I really want to say is, what the Hell are you still doing here??”
“Well, I...”
“You’re chickening again; damn I thought I’d raised you better than that.”
“Ok, first you did not, I raised you and-”
“Who’s becoming a lesbian?”
Buffy pushed her shoulder, “First, I’m not.”
Kennedy raised her eyebrows.
Buffy sighed in panic somehow, “I’m not ready for this, I just...”
“Hey it’s cool. You know I’m kidding you. What matters is that you know in your guts that there’s something not right there. Your girl there is clearly unhappy and I know Buffy the vampire slayer, the one and only, wouldn’t just stay whining on her bed. She would just burst at her place until she knows what’s going wrong to make it better.”
Buffy couldn’t help a light smile but she thought about what Faith had told her.
“What if I can’t? That time has past. I’m not the one and only anymore. Faith said that I can’t fix everything.”
“Well, first that means that there’s definitely something to fix then. And secondly, you’ll always be the one and only, Buffy. I might be the strongest, sexiest, smartest, wittiest slayer known in history but you’ll always be the one and only.”
Buffy couldn’t help but laugh at Kennedy who smiled too.
“I mean it, Buffy. There’s no one else like you. I spend a lot of times with the other girls, I hunt, I talk, I have fun with them... in more ways than one,” She winked, “But... there’s no one else that gives this vibe, you know. No one else like you.”
“Thanks. God I’m really glad you’re here.”
“Of course you do; you’re a sucker for praises.”
Buffy tapped her shoulders again.
“Anyway I mean it, Buffy. And I’m not pushing you to her to make you one of ours, rainbow and all. Frankly I couldn’t care less if you were to date Andrew, Willow or a dog, well, guess I’d mind on that last one. If I’m pushing you to her it’s because... she’s like no one else too. Buffy we... we run through her. She was the one holding the line, you already know that. Buffy to all of us you’re kind of a monument, no I’m serious don’t smile, the girls never stop asking me about you. You’re a hero, Buffy, to all of us. You’re the reason we all got this power. But we run through her. We can feel her somehow. But she... she feels you. Kendra didn’t live long enough for her power to really grow, to really be a power of her own. Faith runs through you. She holds a part of you NO ONE else in the fucking world does. And that makes you two unique. Unique with each other. I don’t think no one could have chosen a better expression than the one she did; the chosen two. Cause really, you are. Us we... we’re just... copies.”
“Kennedy,” Buffy told her as the brunette swallowed.
It made Buffy’s heart squeezed in her chest. She knew what being a slayer meant to Kennedy; it was all her life somehow. So for her to tell her this, it had to be really important.
“Listen to me, Buffy. It’s innate between you two and I don’t want to see this go to trash like that. That’s why I’m telling you this. Running into her randomly like that, it’s a frigging sign. And you know I don’t believe in these things but I know you. I know there’s this part of you that’s unclaimed yet. This part that belongs to just one person and... I don’t want to state or anything but... to me it can’t be anyone else’s but her because she’s just the closest person to you, it’s natural. It’s... like printed in both your souls because I can tell you she’s always had this hidden, private place in her heart too for you. It wasn’t hard to see back then. Even if I didn’t know any of you very well. Not seeing this spark between you would have been hard even with the mess around and Spike and all the drama. She was there only for you, Buffy. She came back only for you. She fought only for you. So maybe it’s nothing to do with love or anything. I don’t assume, but if you believe that there is something wrong, that she’s unhappy and all. Then you HAVE to do something about it. Your instinct can never be more right than about Faith because she’s a part of you and you’re a part of her. You have to do something.”
Buffy sat on the bed, “You know what, Ken? If she doesn’t turn me gay, I’ll marry you at our return in Cleveland, how’s that sound?”
“Like crazy talk. If she doesn’t turn you gay then no one can cause... sorry but she’s like hotter than hot. What more would you want?”
Buffy got up then, “I think you’re kinda right.” Buffy shook her head, “Ok, let’s not blow this. I’m really concerned about her and this has nothing to do with feelings of various types of love... or with her hotness. That, I’ll deal with later... maybe. But you’re right, I need to do something. I owe this to her. So I’m heading there, I’m heading there right now.”
“Do you need me to tag along?”
“Thanks but I should go alone for now. Besides, you have better stay right on this bed without moving or I’ll send your ass back there. It’s not healed yet, don’t try and fool me.”
Kennedy shrugged, “Come on, Andrew was playing the nurse, like I could put up with that?”
Buffy smiled, “If you’re nice, we’ll go out in a couple of nights and try to find you a nice girl to play the nurse with, pretty sure you can have anyone you want in this town. But not Faith. You CAN’t have Faith.”
Kennedy smiled, “Damn, I was thinking about it.”
“Glad we cleared this then.” Buffy told her with a wink.
“Ok, let’s be more serious. No distraction, straight to the heart of the problem. Ok, I’ll see you later, Ken.”
“Bring me lots of spicy details.”
Buffy sighed in a fake scolding look then turned around but back-pedalled then.
She walked closer and took Kennedy’s hand, “You were never a copy, Kennedy. You already stood out from the rest of them way before getting your powers. Never a copy. You’ve always been the real deal. I’ve spent enough time with you to know that.” Buffy bent to place a soft kiss on Kennedy’s forehead, “Now rest, and you’d better still be in bed when I’m back. If I learn you got up, God you’re in for a spanking.”
“Promise?”
Buffy smiled and Kennedy winked at her.
The blonde girl walked away then.
Willow came into Buffy’s room afterwards and she and Kennedy caught up for the few couples of days they hadn’t seen each other. Though they’d talked on the phone.
Buffy kept checking at the clock on her dashboard. It was past 5. She was hoping that Robin wouldn’t be home yet. And that Faith wasn’t working tonight. She would try her work place if she wasn’t home, but Buffy knew she was hardly getting anywhere with her whenever it wasn’t only the two of them.
~
Inside of Robin and Faith’s house.
Cassie was playing in her playpen.
“No you’re not.”
“And why exactly? Besides I don’t think I need your permission. I’ll go out patrolling if I want to, you’re not my father. You can stay here drinking more beers.”
Faith meant to walk away but Robin held her abruptly by the arms.
“Let go of me.”
She shoved him off and he slapped her hard.
“Bastard.”
“Maybe I am, but I’m paying for this place, for your clothes, for Cassies’ clothes. The food and the bills. I’m paying for everything so you’ll do what I say.”
“I have a job too in case you didn’t notice.”
“Oh right how could I forget? The only thing that pay of yours can afford is your stupid college classes. No way I’d pay for a fucking retard who doesn’t even know where Australia is. That’d be a waste of money.”
“Fuck you.” She meant to walk away but he grabbed her strongly again, “I’m not done with you yet.”
“Well, too bad cause I gotta feed Cassie now if I don’t want to be late for work AND later then, patrol.”
“You think I’m stupid? Patrol means getting laid with one of these bastards. I even bet this is why they haven’t fired you yet.”
“Well what can I say...? I’m wicked good in bed.”
Robin punched her so hard she landed on the couch. She wiped the blood from her cut lip.
“Right, like I don’t know what you’re doing with that English teacher, or that trainee last year. And see I don’t make a fuss about it so-“
Faith stopped and took a deep breath when she saw him undoing the belt of his pants.
“Huh huh, no no, no way. Don’t.”
Robin kicked her in the stomach with the flat of his foot as she’d meant to get up from the couch. Her breath was cut and she put her arm to her stomach. He knelt on the couch and lied on top of her.
“No, no, Robin, don’t. God, stop.” She coughed, not back from the kick yet.
“You’re going to fuck me tonight, Faith.”
“God Robin, Cassie’s just here.”
“Then don’t make a fuss about it like you say.”
He started kissing her neck and she struggled to get his hands off of her pants.
“God stops Robin, stop I swear-”
“What? You’re going to kill me? In front of Cassie?”
He tore her shirt apart and started kissing her chest while moving his hands down on her body.
“Please, Robin, don’t do this. I’m really not in the mood. Come on, you’re hurting me.”
“You’re never in the mood for me, Faith. But you need to remember something there, don’t you? Hey, we’re a family darling. So just shut your mouth. I don’t want Cassie to think her parents aren’t perfectly happy. So you’re going to make me happy right now and quit struggling or yes, it will hurt, babe.”
“Please. I really don’t want-“
“I do. You’re gonna do what I say for once. ”
Faith swallowed while Robin undid the buttons of her pants until he was pulled away brutally.
PART 5
Faith straightened as much as she could despite the pain in her stomach.
Buffy was standing there, watching the scene with disbelief. She’d stayed couple of seconds outside, not believing what she was witnessing before getting inside and putting a stop to it.
Robin shook his head a little from the shock.
“I think I heard her say she didn’t want to.”
“Stay out of this, Buffy. This is between her and me.” he said while getting up and buttoning his pants back.
“No. No it’s not.”
Buffy then turned to look at Faith who was trying to button her shirt the best she could with the missing buttons. She avoided looking at Buffy.
“What is this? What...”
“Look, its ok, B. It’s just-“
“He was about to fucking rape you?!?. What’s going on?? And what is this?” She pointed out Faith’s cut lip.
Faith stayed silent.
“I guess I understand the black eyes and the bruises now.”
“You understand nothing, Buffy. Now get out my house.” He told her firmly.
She walked straight to him and locked eyes with him, “You’re right, in fact I don’t understand how on Earth she let you do that. But whatever the reason is for her to not beat the crap out of you, just know that it’s not contagious at all, so you’d better stay out of my way. Faith, get up, you’re coming with me.”
“She’s not going anywhere Buffy.”
“B, look it’s cool, ok. Don’t-”
“I’m not joking, Faith. You get your ass in the car right now. And you,“ she turned to Robin, “are right; she’s not, they are.”
Buffy headed straight to Cassandra’s playpen and took the baby who was crying at the time.
“Wow, wow, Buffy, what do you think you’re doing there? You’re not taking my child anywhere. No way.” He said putting his hand on Buffy’s arm.
Faith had rarely seen Buffy’s eyes so dark than at this moment.
“You have better take your hand off me very fast cause I wasn’t joking earlier. The simple fact that you laid your hand on Faith makes me want to kill you already so really, don’t push me, Wood.”
He removed his hand, “She’s my daughter. You have no right.”
“You’re right.” She put one hand on the back of Cassandra’s head to pull her into her neck to make sure the little girl wouldn’t see her hitting her father so strongly that he fell on the floor.
“You had no right to do this to Faith either, see, life isn’t fair sometimes.”
“Let’s go.” Buffy grabbed the baby seat to put it in Faith’s arms and then ,grabbed the brunette’s hand to exit the house.
Buffy started putting the baby seat on the back seat of her car.
“B, I can’t do that. I really can’t.”
“You’re not leaving the country, Faith. But you can’t stay here tonight. I won’t let you and I’m really serious about that, so now give me a hand cause I have no clue how to settle this thing.”
Faith moved on the back, ”Ssh, it’s ok my baby, momma’s here sweetheart. Ssh, it’s ok now.” She kept whispering to Cassandra while settling the seat correctly. Cassandra calmed down pretty quickly then.
Buffy looked very determined so Faith didn’t say anything else, she just sat on the passenger’s seat and Buffy started the engine.
“Hungry mommy.”
“Yes I know, sweetheart. I should’ve taken something; I didn’t feed her tonight yet.”
“It’s ok, we have everything at the house. Hey Cassandra, do you like pasta? And cheese, does she like cheese?”
Faith nodded.
“Cheese cheese.” Cassandra jumped on her seat as much as her belt allowed her too.
“A lot.” Faith told Buffy who smiled.
Faith then looked by the window and rubbed her forehead. She put one hand on her stomach as it still hurt.
“Can you tell me what is going on now, Faith?”
Faith stayed silent.
“Of all the changes in you this one I really don’t like. How can you let him hit you like that? How can you let him do that to you? You... you really need to help me understand there cause... I really don’t...”
Faith stayed silent.
“Is it why you left him at the beginning?”
“No I... Like I said, I kind of followed him at first but I wasn’t serious. I went my way after a while and he found me back a couple of months later. I was surprised but yeah, still screwed up that’s me; I got back with him. I wasn’t really settled. It was honestly kinda hard, money and stuff so... I thought why not. He’s... He was a pretty decent guy. I didn’t see it as a long term thing, you know me. And then... I found out I was pregnant and for once there was no way for me to say it wasn’t his. I... I took off. Left him a note for him not to look after me cause I didn’t want to stay with him and crap. Well, not so much crap in fact; that wasn’t the life I wanted to lead. I... I wasn’t in love with him. Ok, I’m bullshit; love isn’t what I do simply... not with the guys I fool with at least and I know that, and he was no different so I.... I didn’t want to fake this. Because there was going to be this huge bond between us in the presence of a child but I.... That wasn’t enough for me, I... I didn’t want to be stuck with him all my life so I left. But he found me again, a little more than 1 year later. I tried to say she wasn’t his but he was no fool. He almost threatened me to court if I didn’t let him do the paternity test. So I admitted that there was no need to; she was his.”
“And so you stayed with him.”
“You should have seen the place we were staying at, Buffy; it wasn’t a place to raise a little girl in.”
“But still.”
“I had to blow the owner for him to let us stay, Buffy. God dammit.” Faith said as she realized what she’d just said in front of her daughter. She looked behind but Cassandra was playing with her cuddly blanket, she wasn’t paying much attention and there was no way she could know what those words meant.
Faith looked back at Buffy, “Is this how you’d want to raise your child? And what about school and college funds and all? I couldn’t get a decent job cause I couldn’t pay anyone to keep her. The money I had in advance was spent at the hospital. Seriously B, I was one step away to cross the line again, steal, attack, rob a shop or whatever.”
“Ok I do get it, Faith. I understand. And he’s her father after all. So ok, ok for the beginning, but this, when this started, the beating and badmouthing you like that started. Now. Why don’t you stop this now? You have a job now. You can take care of your self better. I’m not asking why you’re not leaving him but at least, why do you let him treat you like that? There’s nothing you can say that can justify this to me. I-“
“He’ll take her away from me.” Faith said and swallowed.
“What? Faith, he can’t.”
“Yes he can, and he will. Buffy, I’m an ex con.”
“Giles cleared you.”
“No, Giles got me some sort of immunity, Buffy. That’s different. To any judges I haven’t paid my debt to society. Most of them would be glad to make me pay another way.”
“He can’t take her away from you.”
“He’s a principal in a renowned high school; I’m a bouncer in a Mall’s casino. I’m taking classes but I haven’t even graduated. The house is in his name, it was with his money, I have nothing Buffy.... With my police record, I will never get her. I’ll barely get a couple of weekends there and then and... I can’t even think about this. I can’t live without my daughter, B. I’d rather let him kill me than leave without my baby. So yeah, I put up with it. I never raised my voice too much and even less my hands cause he would have taken her away then. He made this very clear. I let him do, yes, I did. I don’t care what that makes of me all I know is I... I’ve never loved anyone like I loved Cassie. I’ve never cared or loved anyone like her since you.”
Buffy looked at her.
Faith kept looking at her, she barely shrugged at the revelation she’d just made, “Don’t tell me it’s really a surprise?”
Buffy returned her gaze to the road, “No, no it’s not.” she quietly replied.
Faith looked by the window.
They stayed silent for a while.
Buffy swallowed when she heard Faith’s first sobs. It was the first time she ever saw her cry and it was a heart wrenching sight, or sound more accurately.
Faith was trying hard to hold back her tears, as usual, but she couldn’t.
Buffy pulled over on the side of the road.
“Hey, hey look at me.” Buffy turned her to her, “He’s not, you hear me, not taking her away, never. I will never let that happen. You can trust me cause I’m Buffy, ok?”
Faith let a light smile out.
“We’ll find a way but you will never have to put up with this anymore. I’ll never let him lay one hand on you or Cassandra. And he’s not the most powerful one here. We’ll find a way with Giles and Willow.”
“God I don’t want them to-“
“Hey, we’re family, Faith. Yes, that’s what we are. And you’re very much a part of it. They won’t even ask any questions, Faith, they’ll just help. That’s what they do best. Why do you think we all came back together? Because that’s what we do, and we do it best all together. So now, you’re gonna be ok. I won’t let you down, ok? So quit crying cause this is just too disturbing to me.”
Faith held back a laugh, “Bet you didn’t think I even had tears in me huh?”
“Well, it’s rather that I didn’t think it could affect me so much to see you cry.” Buffy said very low while reaching for Faith’s face to wipe those tears away, ”So now you’re going to be fine. Look at her Faith, you have the most beautiful daughter in the world and you’ve done the most amazing job with her and there’s nothing that can ever stop that. And also now... you’re not alone anymore.”
“Thank you, thank you, Buffy. I’d never thought...”
Faith trailed off and Buffy wiped more tears away, “Well, I’m here.”
They smiled knowingly at each other.
“Mommy?”
“Yes sweetie.”
“Are you crying? You got cratch?”
Both Buffy and Faith lightly laughed at this. The brunette hopped in the back, “No baby, mommy got no scratch. Mommy’s fine. And Cassie’s fine too, right my baby.”
Buffy started her engine again; Faith stayed in the back with her daughter.
Buffy couldn’t help but smile at their little talk during the rest of the way.
Buffy pulled over in front of the property Giles had rented.
She took Cassandra in her arms as Faith walked out by the other side. She gave her back to her mother then.
They started walking slowly on the path leading to the door.
“He hasn’t always been like that Buffy, you know. And he’s not a bad father at all.”
“Well, I was kind of thinking about this on the way. He really didn’t seem like these types of men.”
“He wasn’t. He isn’t. I mean... I guess he just...”
“What happened? What changed?”
“He fell in love with me. Guess he wouldn’t have tried to find me, twice, after I left if he didn’t. But I did not. I guess that’s what happened. Plus every so called ok with my girlfriend being stronger than me man is a liar. I mean, as much as they think they are, they’re not. They can’t really handle that fact. They need to be stronger, they need us to need them and... I really didn’t. Robin had never been needy. He’s really strong but you know that already. Self confident, attractive, strong and independent, but I was all that too, and more than him even. And he couldn’t stand it. Plus I’m not easy to live with but I tried; I really tried at the beginning but I couldn’t be less than I am. It started out as him constantly trying to belittle me, sometimes really embarrassing me in front of friends or such with cultural comments and stuff he knew I had no idea about. He had to come out as superior in one way and that was his domain. I didn’t say anything. I thought it was what was best to do, ignore it. But it only made him even bitter cause it reminded him that I really didn’t care about him or his friends, or his whole life somehow. He started to drink a little too. Like tonight, he wouldn’t have done that if he hadn’t had a couple of beers already. The day we had our first big fight he slapped me and I broke his wrist. He had the cops arrest me for that. I spent three days in jail, the first time of my life I was separated from my daughter. I was so pissed at him but that’s when he pulled it; the threat. If I ever just lay one slayer hand on him again, he would take her away from me. I’d never see her again. I couldn’t even stand that thought; 3 days and I was already getting crazy not seeing her. He enumerated all the things that made it impossible for me not to believe he could actually do it. I really freaked. I thought for a moment about getting away with her, you know. But... this isn’t the life I wanted for her, on the road, fugitive. Plus he knows about supernatural and I’m pretty sure he would have found a way to find me again, with magic or something. I couldn’t risk it. But things aren’t always like what you’ve seen. They tend to be more and more that’s true but... I usually let it slide. I guess seeing you... well, it brought a certain part of me back to life.”
“Well, I’m glad it did, cause this isn’t how you’re supposed to live your life. And from now on I’ll show you how it’s supposed to be, but for now you need to rest a little and take a break. You look exhausted Faith.”
“I’m pretty wired, yes.”
“I’ll need to check your waist though.”
Buffy hadn’t failed to notice Faith kept touching her stomach.
“Did he punch you there? Didn’t see the entire thing.”
“He kicked me.”
Buffy sighed, really upset, “I hope he didn’t break you any ribs cause I’m gonna break more than this to him.”
Faith put her hand on Buffy’s arm, “Thank you, Buffy. You don’t know what it means to me.”
They stared at each other. Buffy put a lock of Faith’s hair behind her ear and smiled at her,
“Come on, let’s get in.” Buffy opened the door.
“Hey Buffy, how did it, oh hey Faith.”
“Hey Red.” Faith seemed a bit uncomfortable but Willow immediately moved closer. She reached for Cassandra’s face while her other hand reached Faith’s shoulder that she squeezed gently, “Oh my God, you were so right, Buffy. She is so beautiful.”
“Will, do we have some pastas and cheese? Cassandra didn’t eat.”
“Of course, Buffy. What about you Faith? Have you eaten?”
“Oh err, no, don’t bother for me, red. I’m not really hungry.”
“You look a little pale; you should have something, Faith.”
“Thanks but I’ll be alright.”
“Ok. Don’t hesitate; what’s more, Giles is out for the moment so you have time.”
“Time?”
Both slayers looked at Willow.
“You came here to see Giles about the demons I suppose, right?”
“Well, err.”
“Actually, Will, Faith and Cassie are going to stay here for a little while.”
“Oh, good.”
Faith looked a little surprised at how casually Willow took the news.
The witch smiled at her, ”If there’s anything I can do... I’m gonna bring the disinfectant for this first.” Willow gently pointed out Faith’s bruised lip. It was still opened.
“Oh thanks but, I’ll be alright. It’ll be close by the morning. Thanks, Re-Willow.”
“You can keep calling me red, you know. I don’t mind.”
Faith and her nodded at each other.
“Is Ken still in the room?”
Willow nodded, ”I’m telling you, Buffy; you’re the only one who can get this girl to stay still of her own will.”
Buffy briefly smiled.
“So, she’s back already. Well, not that much of a surprise I suppose.”
Buffy nodded at Faith, ”She’s even more stubborn that you and I, I’m telling you. But she definitely needs to stay still for a couple more days though. I think she knows it. I guess she can do that here, can’t she?”
Willow smiled, “I just gave her the painkillers, they tend to make her... weird sometimes and dizzy or kinda merry actually. We might have to help her move to my room, or just stay in yours Buffy whatever, but this way Faith and Cassandra can take the guest room.”
“Actually I’d rather have them stay with me tonight.”
Buffy turned to Faith, “If it’s ok with you. I just wanna make sure you’re ok.”
Buffy turned to Willow, “She took a bad kick in the stomach.” She explained.
“B, it’s cool. I don’t want to bug you. I’ll be fine you know and-“
“Faith I-“
Willow noticed the way Buffy’s hand moved to Faith’s and how Faith automatically squeezed it.
“I want to make sure you’re ok. I... You and Cassie are staying with me. I won’t be able to sleep otherwise, plus Kennedy needs to rest too and if she stays with me there’s absolutely no way we’ll get any sleep at all.”
Buffy blushed a little at Faith and Willows’ gaze, “And that absolutely didn’t mean what you’re both thinking about right now.“
“Not thinking anything, B.” Faith said while raising her hands innocently though she and Willow shared a smile.
“So, anyway please, I’d really preferred if you stayed in my room.”
“Fine by me, B. You might not get much sleep either then. I mean, I just meant, with the kid and all.”
Buffy gave Willow a scolding smile as the witch started to laugh.
Willow looked serious again, “That’s settled then. You two together and I’ll make sure Ken’s taking it easy in the guest room.”
Buffy called Giles to ask him for something before he came back to the house.
After feeding Cassandra, the slayers walked upstairs.
Buffy knocked at her door room, “Take your fingers out of the pie, Ken, we’re coming in.”
“Ah ah, very funny grandma.”
Buffy opened the door, “Call me that again and I’ll send you back to hospital.”
“You so can’t take me, Buffy. Oh wow, is that Faith? Wow you’re already moving in together, wow B, I’m impressed. You moved so fast for once.”
Buffy rubbed her forehead while Faith held back a smile.
“And now I suppose you want the bed so... it’s my definite pleasure to give it back. Have fun.”
Willow grabbed Kennedy’s hand, the ex potential shrugged,
“You insisted I was cool, Buffy.” She told her friend whose face hadn’t yet showed all shades of red known in history.
Faith kept looking quietly at the scene while Willow gave Buffy some kind of apologising gaze before closing the door behind them.
“And hey remember; I need to rest so don’t be too loud!”
Was the last they heard of Kennedy before Willow locked her in the guest room.
Buffy took her head to her hands briefly.
Buffy and Faith stared at each other a bit awkwardly.
“So, she really is your best friend?”
“Err, yep, I thank God every morning for that.” She sarcastically let out.
Faith couldn’t help but laugh and held her daughter tighter.
“Anyway, it’s the med doctors gave her, you know, plus she’s been single for a while so... she’s, you know, kinda delirium about that.”
“Sure.” Faith told her with a nod and they smiled.
PART 6
Buffy gestured Faith to sit on the bed. Faith was still holding Cassandra very close to her. Buffy could see how concerned she was about her. She hadn’t let go of her since they’d stepped into the house.
Buffy knew there was no way in the world she would let anyone take her away from Faith. She knew it would just devastate Faith. No, it would kill her.
Buffy smiled, Faith was sitting rather awkwardly on the edge of the bed with Cassandra somehow falling asleep in her arms.
Buffy stepped in closer, “Please Faith, make yourself comfortable.”
“Ok.” Faith held Cassandra against her chest with one hand while starting to take her jacket off.
Buffy smiled again and moved closer, Faith gave a short jump as Buffy finished taking it off for her.
Faith shivered.
Buffy stood up again, “I could take your shoes off for you but I think it’s best somewhat if...” Buffy stretched her arms nicely.
Faith smiled, ”Sure, sorry about that. She’s... all I’ve got, you know. I mean.”
Faith gave Cassandra to Buffy.
“I understand, don’t worry.”
Buffy gently sat on the bed, against the headboard with Cassandra in her arms.
Faith took off her shoes and sat beside Buffy.
Buffy meant to give her Cassandra back but Faith gestured her to keep her,
“She’s falling asleep.” Faith whispered.
The slayers smiled at each other then Buffy gently laid Cassandra on the mattress in between the two of them.
Faith started caressing her daughter’s face tenderly while staring at her.
Buffy was staring at Faith then.
“Faith I-“
Buffy stopped as she had to take a deeper breath when Faith looked up at her. She always had such an intense stare.
Buffy finally went on, “I know this can’t compare but... you... have me too, sorta. I mean, I want you to know that you can really count on me.”
Faith smiled, “I know. I mean I can feel it. That’s what I’ve always wanted back then but I’ve never felt it until now. I know how awkward it might sound since we’ve been away for so long and only just met again, but I really do feel it and it’s...” This time it’s Faith who had to take a deeper breath, “It means more than I have words for, B.”
Faith then looked at Cassandra again.
Buffy smiled, even if she talked a little more, it was still hard for Faith to admit or let her feelings show like she’d done tonight.
Buffy smiled somehow because this was part of the reason she loved her.
**Wow, wow, freeze; I love her? Where did that come from? For all I know I just had some sort of crush on her, didn’t I? Not even, Kennedy said passion, didn’t she? Oh, isn’t that worse? And this is very bad cause I’m back rambling to myself. Ok; back to the L word now, who said that then, oh right; it’s me. I don’t know. I feel for her. Oh boy Kennedy would kill me if she heard this. It’s been a while I haven’t pulled out that one. What does that even mean “I feel for someone”. I’m so full of crap sometimes. So, again, back to this L word. Why did I even freak about it again? I love Will, I love Ken, Hell I even love Andrew. So why did I really thought of it as the loving love then?**
“This is my beautiful girl.” Faith placed a soft kiss on Cassandra’s forehead, “I love you baby.” She whispered.
Buffy saw tears in the back of Faith’s eyes when she pulled away.
**That is why. She’s just the most wonderful person I’ve ever met. And she’s always been. And I don’t want to miss more of her.**
Faith smiled with a hint of surprise at Buffy’s intense stare on her then.
“I just find this amazing the way you...”
Faith smiled, ”It’s my daughter, Buffy. There’s nothing amazing there except for her. She’s a miracle to me. But the way I love her; I think, I don’t know, it’s innate to every parent I think. I mean, you’d be the same with your children. It’s... I mean I think.”
“I don’t know, you’re probably right... But... how was your mother with you?”
Faith lowered her gaze to Cassandra, “She left me. I mean I was on foster care till 5. She took me back then dropped me again at 9 and then took me back at 12 and then one day she was so drunk that she fell on the stairs... and so that was a definitive come back to foster care, well, until my watcher took me with her a couple months before I was called.”
Buffy put her hand on the back of Faith’s, “I’m sorry.”
“Not your fault.”
“No I’m... I’m sorry because... this is the kind of things I should know already, like say, if I’d even asked you back then.”
“Well, if that can make you feel better, I wouldn’t have told you at the time.”
“But still, I know you were hoping that I’d asked at least, or expecting me to but I was too-”
“Hey, B. I thought you said no regrets, no bad memories, no turning back with bitterness or sorrow. So don’t do this. Seriously, you looked really fine when we met again, you do look really fine and me, I have the most beautiful gift I could ever asked for with Cassandra, and now you... you’re here so... this is even kind of surreal to me but SO what I’ve always wanted, so why would I turn back with regrets?”
Buffy smiled, “You’re right.”
Faith reached out for one of Buffy’s locks and she put it backward, brushing against the blonde girl’s cheek. Buffy swallowed. She moved her face a little closer, so did Faith but a knock resounded at the door.
“Err, yes?”
Buffy said as she straightened on the bed while Faith shook her head in disbelief over what almost happened. She’d long given up on this happening but ever since she’d seen Buffy... Everything, every feeling had come back, and with this, hope, hope that it could indeed happen. But it really felt like unreal for now. So fast, so confusing... So good... Too good.
Giles opened the door and stepped in, “Good evening, Buffy, Faith. I’m pleased to see you again.”
Willow walked into the room pushing a kid’s bed in it.
“This is the best I could find at this hour. Most of the stores were closed.”
Buffy got up and nodded to her watcher. She put the little bed not too far from hers, “That’ll be fine.”
Faith looked a little incredulous.
Giles gave the brunette his fatherly look, “Buffy called me earlier. She briefly explained the situation and had me bring this for Cassandra. I also took a couple of clothes. Didn’t know what you’d had time to take so.”
“Well, not much in fact. I’d just given her the bath and changed her into her night clothes. She hadn’t even eaten. I... have nothing else.”
Giles handed her the plastic bag he had, “Here, this isn’t much, and so isn’t the bed but it should do for a couple of days. Then we’ll see in time. We’ll talk about the situation tomorrow. I should let you rest now.”
“Err, yes. Thanks, I. Thanks.” She told them with a light smile.
Giles and Willow returned the smile and walked away.
Faith still had trouble to realize how ‘welcomed’ and taken care of she was. It was something really new for her, mostly with these people.
By the time she got out of her thoughts Buffy had taken Cassandra in her arms and was settling her under the cover of the neatly made baby bed.
Buffy had put the clothes Giles had taken for Cassandra on a desk. She put in the bed a funny looking teddy bear Giles had bought for her.
“Willow put an extra cover, that’s good. I know it’s the summer but it’s kinda cold over here at night, don’t you think?”
Faith was lost in the sight of Buffy gently tucking Cassandra in her bed.
“Faith?” Buffy called without taking her gaze off of Cassandra whose forehead she kissed when she was done.
Only then she looked at Faith who was still staring at her deeply.
Buffy looked hesitant, “Did I do it wrong? I’m not really used to-“
“No, no really you... did it just fine...”
Buffy smiled and took her boots off to settle on the bed once again.
“I still can’t believe she didn’t wake up with the talking and moving her. Didn’t realize kids could sleep that tight.”
“Not all kids. But yeah, I think she got that from me. She hasn’t been sleeping that good for a while though. We’re always arguing him and I and as much as we both try to spare her... It’s not really working.”
Faith looked sad then.
“But it’s over now.”
Faith still looked sad, “I wanted to make it work, for her.”
“You need to think about yourself too, Faith. I understand that he’s her father and for her you.... I guess every parent wants what’s best for their kid and try to keep it together for their kid’s well being, but when it’s really falling apart, sometimes the best they can do for them is stop, stop before it gets to craziness like what I’ve witnessed tonight. Because this would hurt her more than her parents splitting when she’s so little. And I think you know that.”
Faith nodded.
“Believe me there’s nothing I wanted more than my parents getting back together after they got divorced, but I was just being selfish. Together they were only fighting and hating each other more and more. I know my mom was happy again for the last years of her life which wouldn’t have been the case if she’d stayed with him.”
“I understand.”
They stayed silent for a short while.
“Did he... did he ever do what he started earlier, I mean, without anyone stopping him this time?” Buffy couldn’t help but asked.
Faith lowered her gaze, “Twice, three times. Well, twice and a half I guess.”
Buffy frowned, “And a half, what half?”
“The half when he’s the only one dropping the pants and holds me by my hair on my knees.” Faith replied honestly with a gulp though.
“Sorry I asked. Well, sorry period.”
Buffy was propped on her elbow and so was Faith.
“I’ve put him through shits too, you know.”
Buffy put a lock of Faith’s hair aside, ”No, I don’t. There’s nothing that can ever excuse this.”
“Well, it wasn’t worse than what a couple of my boyfriends did to me in high school when I couldn’t actually stop them. With Robin I just.... I knew I could stop him. I willingly let aside the thought that in a way I couldn’t, I wouldn’t. I just focused on the knowledge that I could and just let him do, for Cassandra. But I kept telling myself that it wasn’t so bad. I was allowing him in a way since I could stop him. I know it makes no sense but that was all I could think of to not lose it and just kill him... All I could do to stand this.”
Buffy couldn’t help but caress Faith’s cheek, “You know it can’t go on, Faith. It has to stop for good now.”
Faith nodded lightly but looked away.
“Ok, enough talking about this, you need to rest. Lie down, I’m gonna clean your lips. Still haven’t done that.”
“It’s cool, B. I think it’s closed already.”
“Good, then just let me see.”
Faith slowly settled over the covers while Buffy got up to take a piece of cotton and put some water on it.
“Here, don’t move.”
Faith swallowed a little as Buffy bent closer to her.
The older slayer then gently pressed the wet cotton on Faith’s bruised corner of the lips.
“Does it hurt?”
Faith shook her head; she took a deep breath when Buffy lightly ran a fingertip on her lower lip.
“It should be gone by tomorrow night.”
“Told you.” Faith just said with a deeper inhale though.
Buffy smiled at her and got up to put the cotton away. She lied down on the bed and propped herself on her elbow once again staring at Faith.
Faith took a deeper breath once again as Buffy reached for her waist, she lightly lifted her shirt. She ran her hand softly on Faith’s stomach causing the brunette’s chest to rise. Buffy moved herself a little downer to Faith’s body.
“Is it here?”
“Huh, oh, err, no, more on the left.” Faith finally managed to say, understanding Buffy’s gesture.
What other reason than checking her stomach bruise would she have to be caressing her like that anyway. Cause yes, caressing was really how it felt like to Faith.
“It doesn’t seem broken.”
Faith grimaced a little when Buffy pressed a little more.
“I think it’s just cracked.”
“I think so.” Buffy confirmed.
“See, no need to worry, it’ll be fine soon.” Faith said, trying to lighten up Buffy’s concerned face.
“Yes it will.” Buffy told her with a smile.
Buffy then turned her gaze back to Faith’s stomach and she looked absent-minded then.
Faith was about to speak when she saw Buffy’s hand moving to her stomach again.
Faith swallowed at Buffy’s light touches on it.
Buffy slowly ran her fingertips from the place Faith hurt to her bellybutton then a little higher until she reached Faith’s shirt.
Faith swallowed again when Buffy laid her hand flat on her belly.
“You’re so warm.” She just stated, she seemed lost in this warmth at that moment.
Faith couldn’t believe the way Buffy was looking at her right now. It wasn’t lust, not at all. It was so much better than this.
Buffy slowly started undoing the three remaining buttons on Faith’s shirt, the others being somewhere on the floor of Robin’s living room.
Faith let her do. She was unable to take her gaze off of the look of pure admiration in Buffy’s eyes.
Buffy slowly parted the shirt on both sides of Faith and took a deep breath at the sight in front of her. Her hand kept on travelling up on Faith’s body, touching her skin very lightly. She ran her fingertips in between Faith’s black bra, following their path with her eyes until her hand reached Faith’s face. Then their gaze locked and they couldn’t look away.
“You are so beautiful.” Buffy whispered very slowly, very honestly while Faith reached for Buffy’s face.
Buffy moved an inch closer and Faith’s hand slid to the back of Buffy’s to pull her closer until their lips touch.
Soft contact first, lips on lips, slowly brushing against each other’s until Buffy moved closer and deepened the kiss.
Faith’s hand slid to Buffy’s waist while the other slid on her shoulders via the top of her shirt.
Buffy laid completely over Faith, keeping the brunette on her back while the kiss intensified.
Faith left Buffy’s mouth to kiss her neck while Buffy’s hand found its spot back on Faith’s stomach.
“Buffy, Buffy, God,” Faith whispered trying to pull away.
She glanced at Cassandra’s bed briefly.
“She’s sleeping... tight.” Buffy whispered.
Faith took the older slayer’s face in between her hands “I know, I know. But... Buffy I... If we... I won’t be able to stop, not with you.”
Buffy gently ran her fingertip on Faith’s jaw line.
“I don’t... I don’t want you to.”
Faith pulled her closer into a passionate kiss once again. Buffy gasped when Faith switched position.
Buffy checked on Cassandra’s bed too.
“We’ll have to be real quiet.” Faith whispered.
Buffy nodded, her heart rose in her chest at Faith’s gaze on her.
PART 7
Faith stared intensely at the smaller girl under her, staring at her every feature, before running her fingertips everywhere she’d just been looking at. She started undoing the buttons of Buffy’s shirt. She bent down to kiss her before kissing her way down.
Buffy looked at the ceiling, the thought that being quiet was going to be hard crossed her mind when she found herself already moaning at Faith’s mouth on her pulse point. She lightly moved up from the bed for Faith to remove her shirt completely. Faith took hers away as well.
Buffy pulled her face into a wild kiss once again. Faith slid her hand under Buffy’s back and unclasped the older girl’s bra in no time.
Faith felt the heat rose a million degrees in the very second.
“You are so fucking beautiful Buffy.”
Buffy pulled her closer into another passionate kiss then Faith resumed her path down.
This time Buffy was ready for the intensity that were Faith’s kisses so it helped with the not crying out when Faith grabbed one of her nipples in her mouth and started sucking on it while expertly fondling her other breast.
Faith’s mouth switched breasts while her hand moved south.
Buffy let a slight gasp out when Faith pressed on her crotch over her pants that she started unbuttoning then.
“Are you sure?”
“Definitely.” Buffy whispered while raising her pelvis already.
Faith smiled this off too rare childish smile of hers just like every time she was getting something she’d never thought she would.
This innocent gaze was very fast replaced by a predatory look as she started getting Buffy rid of her pants.
Faith began kissing her way down once again.
Buffy started squeezing the sheets when Faith kissed her center over the fabric of her panties. She placed several kisses there.
Buffy felt like she was going to have an attack so much her heart rose in her chest. She felt like she was about to explode.
Faith gently pulled on the panties, enough to get where she really wanted to.
“Oh God.” Buffy put her hand to her mouth when she felt Faith’s tongue on her sensitive mound.
Buffy squeezed the sheets so tight she made a hole on one side.
That was nothing compared to what she did to Faith’s hair after the brunette had removed her panties completely to give all her attention to Buffy’s heated center.
It took Buffy’s hand a good long while to get its color back so hard she’d bitten on it not to cry out her release after the long delightful ministrations of Faith’s tongue.
As for Buffy herself, well it took her all but feeling Faith’s finger inside of her to open her eyes again with a gasp.
Faith was staring at her and the first thing Buffy did was to pull her closer into a deep kiss.
Buffy’s hands moved down to reach the hem of Faith’s pants. Faith moaned at Buffy’s eagerness to strip her. She kissed Buffy’s neck then pulled away, removing her finger from within Buffy to finish the job. She took her pants and panties off in no time and laid back on top of Buffy, pressing her body into Buffy’s. She moaned when Buffy wrapped her legs just under her buttocks to harden the pressure of Faith’s pelvis on her crotch.
“Faith.” Buffy moaned.
Buffy moved one leg apart and gently forced it in between Faith’s.
Buffy moved her hands to Faith’s butt as much as she could and she pushed the brunette deep on herself while moving her knee up as much as she could.
Faith groaned rather loudly and started rubbing herself strongly, still accompanied by Buffy’s hands on her bottom.
Buffy kept on kissing her neck. She wanted to make her come as much as she wanted to come again from Faith’s ministrations.
“God, Buffy.”
Faith buried her face in Buffy’s neck to kiss her warmly.
Buffy gasped when she felt Faith’s finger inside of her once again. She arched her back to meet the pleasant intrusion. Faith quickly fastened the pace.
“God Buffy... You don’t know... how many girls I did that to... thinking it was you... Closing my eyes so tight that... I wouldn’t be able to even recognize them cause... all I could see was you, in my mind... It was always you.”
aith fastened the thrusts, Buffy felt herself very close but she held it back to put her hands on Faith’s face, ”Look at me, Faith. Open your eyes, look,” Buffy whispered.
Faith finally opened her eyes again.
“It’s really me today. No need to imagine anymore. You can look at me cause I... I’m right here... with you.”
“Oh God, oh God.”
Buffy felt Faith’s nails dug into her flesh as the brunette climaxed above her, speeding the thrusts of her finger at the same time.
Buffy held her tight on top of her and held back a loud groan which therefore turned into a loud exhale as she climaxed for the second time that night.
Faith was breathing really loudly. She stayed a couple of seconds on top of Buffy before looking up at her, “God I love you, Buffy.”
Faith looked like she’d received an electric shock suddenly.
“Oh no, no. I-I ,no-” She pulled away all of a sudden but Buffy held her back strongly,
“No, Faith, no don’t, please don’t. Don’t.”
Buffy got Faith on her back and found herself partly on top of her, “Please don’t. Don’t.” She said with a gentle caress on Faith’s face.
The brunette swallowed.
Buffy kept her gentle caresses until she was sure Faith wouldn’t freak out anymore towards what she’d said.
Buffy placed a soft kiss on Faith’s lips.
The brunette stared at her, “I can’t believe...” she trailed off and caressed Buffy’s cheek then pulled her hand away.
She glanced at Cassandra.
“She’s still asleep.” Buffy told her without looking at the young kid.
Faith smiled at the fact that Buffy had already checked on her daughter.
Faith looked more serious now as she stared at the ceiling,
“I’ve wanted this for so long, Buffy...” she sighed, “But I have Cassandra now. I... I can’t mess up. I’ve done that enough already. I need... She’s growing up so fast... I need to do things the right way now. I can’t mess up anymore.”
“I totally agree with that, Faith.” Buffy said while playfully caressing Faith’s stomach.
“But I don’t consider what just happened to be messing up.”
“I know, I mean no. I mean. Ok, you saw me with Steve the other day but honestly, I’d stopped it with him 6 months ago. I wanted to be clean, you know. I didn’t want my child to ever think of me as this type of women. And then you showed and with you... pretty much everything that I want and can not have, or so I thought,”
Buffy smiled at this.
“All this plus Robin and I having this huge fight and it was enough for a relapse I guess. It’s just like everything that’s so wrong in my life just came back slamming right into to my face, you know. But I wasn’t doing this anymore. I mean I didn’t want to. And you... Well you, God thinking you could want me this way. I mean, God knows I could never resist. I knew I always wanted more with you than sleeping together but... still... I can not resist. And I have to resist.”
Buffy couldn’t help but smile with a sigh, “Faith, is it really so hard for you to think that I could want you for more than this. Do you really think this is a one night stand, because honestly; I don’t do one night stands, well, unless I don’t know it’s going to be a one night stand. And in my mind this; us tonight.... this is everything but a one night stand desire.”
Faith stared at her and ran her hand on Buffy’s cheek. Buffy cuddled into the touch.
“It’s just... so sudden. I mean...”
“Is it? Really? Cause I rather think it’s been hatching for a while. Those feelings, those kisses, those touches... I don’t regret any of this. And yes, meeting again was sudden but I couldn’t have been more ready for you than I am now.”
“Buffy I... I have no qualifications, no place to live, probably won’t have a job for long. And I have a 43 months old girl to take care of.”
“I know, a beautiful little daughter. I know.”
“What I meant is... do you think you’re ready for this, cause I’m not sure I am.”
Buffy took Faith’s hand in hers, “Faith. I just want you to take it easy for a while. You are so totally at home here. We are here and we won’t let you down. I’m not asking you for anything except for letting me take care of you a little. Yes I know your situation is complicated. But that’s why I want you to smile a little and not take it so hard on yourself. We’re here, I’m here. You’re not on the street and Cassandra will always have someone to take care of her if you just let us help you. Like, just now, staying here. Everything is fine. You’re safe, she’s safe. Look at her, sleeping so soundly.”
They both stared at the sleeping little girl.
Faith smiled.
“See, that’s what I mean; things are lightening up. Just because they never did doesn’t mean they never will. Cause they are now. I know each thing in time so I’m not asking for anything else than you letting me be here for you. And things then will go as they should I believe. And I.... I love you too.”
Faith felt like her breath was taken away at this moment.
They stared at each other for a while until Buffy moved closer and they kissed. Her hand very fast started exploring Faith’s body again, so did her mouth. She very fast took care of Faith’s nipples. Well, she did get there very fast indeed, but stayed there very long.
Faith could feel her wetness coming back double quick.
The brunette gasped when Buffy’s finger reached her clit.
Faith put her hand in Buffy’s hair as Buffy started licking her stomach.
Faith arched her back at Buffy’s finger sliding inside of her.
“God this smell... So strong.”
Buffy moaned as Faith’s sex scent invaded her nostrils and overwhelmed her entire body as she was getting close to Faith’s heated center.
“Oh my God.”
Faith looked at Cassandra and put her hand in her mouth then when Buffy started going down on her while keeping her finger thrusts.
Faith thought she was about to die when Buffy replaced her finger by her tongue while her thumb stroked her clit.
After a while Buffy replaced her tongue by her finger once again, adding a second. She started sucking hard on Faith’s clit at the same time.
“Oh God.” Faith couldn’t help crying out, as stifled as she could, but still a cry out as she came hard in Buffy’s mouth.
The both of them glanced at Cassandra’s bed. Buffy then moved up to lie beside Faith since Cassandra was still peacefully asleep.
Buffy lied half on top of Faith. She could feel Faith’s chest rising up and down very fast.
Buffy smiled contentedly when Faith wrapped her arm around her. They stayed silent for a while.
Faith moved them both under the covers when she felt Buffy shivering a little. They stayed in the same position then.
Faith started stroking Buffy’s hair lightly.
“So, you and Kennedy?”
“No. No way. Definitely not.“ Buffy said with a smile.
Faith smiled too.
“We’re really great friends, close friends, but really not that type of close. So, no, you’re the only woman I’ve ever been with, and wanted to be with.”
Buffy felt Faith’s grip on her tightening a little, imperceptibly for non slayers. Buffy liked that feeling a lot.
Buffy smiled naughtily then and looked at Faith, “Was I that good?”
Faith couldn’t help but return the naughty grin, “Well, honestly for a first timer, wow; yes, you were.”
Buffy smiled again and rested her head on Faith’s chest once again,
“Ken and I; definitely not having this relationship but... we talk a lot. Well SHE talks a lot, about this I mean... She can be really naughty sometimes. That’s one of her favourite topic, you know.”
“Well, that’s a good topic.”
Buffy smiled, “So anyway, yep she told me stuff. But honestly, I had to get started before any of this comes back to my mind. It was... I was totally blank mind there for a minute. But I could feel this vibe, this feeling taking hold of me as soon as I started and it all seemed very clear to me, very natural and... I really liked doing it.”
Buffy looked at Faith with a shy smile and she could have sworn she saw Faith blushing a little.
Buffy looked more serious all of a sudden, “Ok, err, I have to be honest. I’ve truly never been with a woman but now that I think about it, err, one year ago I... kind of witnessed Kennedy and a friend; ok no, I did not witness I was in a room with them, sitting on a chair looking at them on purpose and God don’t ask me why.”
Faith couldn’t help but smile.
Buffy frowned, “No in fact, I think it’s better if you ask me why.”
Faith smiled even more, “Ok, why?”
“It was a challenge. We were at a bar and she started hitting on this girl who hit back on her. We ended up talking and having a good time and Kennedy was going on and on about the great sex that is girl on girl sweatiness. Those are her words, the most correct she used anyway. She can be so crude sometimes even you would be shocked.”
Faith softly laughed.
“So anyway, she ended up challenging me to watch them do the deed and NOT get wet.”
Faith couldn’t hold back her laugh this time.
Buffy blushed a little, “The girl was totally fine with it so we went home and I watched. God I felt so embarrassed at first. Kennedy has this way to make me do the craziest stuff. Did I tell you she’s the one who got me to go to your place right away tonight? Not that it is a crazy thing.”
Faith smiled, “I’ll have to thank her then.”
The slayers stared intensely at each other before Buffy went on,
“It’s also her who got my slayer-in-charge’s-tight-ass, as she said, back from Europe to my friends instead of playing my lonesome victim act again, still her words.”
Buffy smiled at the thought, “So anyway, I admit it, I did get wet, really wet. And I probably got really flushed cause Kennedy later told me she got scared at some point that I was going to join them in bed. I was glad when she told me this in fact cause it really proved we’re both on the same level in our relationship, it’s really not this kind, you know. So anyway, I was 50 bucks lighter that day cause I lost the bet but the truth is; I didn’t feel like joining them at any moment as I told Ken. No, really, the only woman I’ve ever felt like holding, and touching this way is you. I don’t think any other could have this effect on me.”
Buffy didn’t resist looking at Faith then to gauge her reaction.
Faith pulled Buffy’s hair out of her face and smiled at her.
Buffy moved closer just for their lips to touch in a light kiss.
“We should sleep now.” She whispered before another soft kiss.
She laid her head back on Faith’s chest.
Buffy woke up past 8 in the morning. She felt the warm presence of Faith on her side. She smiled. She took a deep breath, remembering the events of the past few days, and of last night mostly.
She’d never thought something like this could happen just one week from now. And yet, at the minute she’d seen Faith she’d wanted to feel her closer, she’d wanted to hold her tight as if she was a part of her, like she’d found a missing arm, or a missing piece of herself. That’s really how it had felt. And it was confirmed that night.
Buffy had never felt so peaceful and complete than she did now.
She smiled then when she heard a slight giggle. She looked on the side and Cassandra was looking at her.
Buffy smiled. She sat on the bed, making sure that A, Cassandra wouldn’t see any intimate part of her body, and B, that she wasn’t waking Faith up by moving too fast.
She put on the closest T-shirt she could grasp.
“Aunty, B.”
Buffy caressed the young girl’s cheek, “How are you doing sweetie?”
Cassandra giggled then and showed up her teddy bear to Buffy, “Telling stories to Bobby. Bobby is hungry.”
Buffy couldn’t help but smile, “Bobby?”
Cassandra nodded.
“Ok. Then what about we go feed... Bobby, huh?”
Cassandra nodded hugely while sucking on her security blanket.
Buffy turned to look at Faith still sleeping peacefully.
“Mommy hungry.”
“No sweetheart. Mommy will come later, ok? Mommy needs to sleep. Mommy tired. Mommy will stay here, ok?”
Cassandra gave Buffy a puzzled look for a while, she looked at her mother and Buffy caressed the back of the kid’s head, “Do you want to come with me Cassie? And let mommy sleep. She will be waiting right here; we’ll give Bobby a good breakfast just you and me and go back to see mommy very fast.”
Cassandra seemed to hesitate before nodding with a huge smile at her aunt.
“You’re a good girl. Now, auntie B is going to take an extra fast go in the bathroom and you and me are going downstairs where I’m sure pancakes are waiting for Bobby. Does Bobby like pancakes?”
Cassandra nodded hugely.
Buffy smiled, “Ok, then just wait for me. I’ll be really fast. Don’t wake mommy up ok. Be nice for mommy.”
Cassandra nodded again.
Buffy was indeed very fast. She took a shower and was back less than 5 minutes later. She wasn’t even totally dry. Even if it wasn’t what she had planned, the sight she found then couldn’t get anything else than a smile from her.
Cassandra had gotten out of her bed and walked to Buffy’s. She was now cuddled into Faith’s protective embrace. And the two seemed asleep.
Buffy put on some clean clothes and put some for Faith in case she wakes up before she’s back. Then she left to go downstairs.
PART 8
Kennedy was sitting at the kitchen’s table, drinking her coffee. She was back to the door. Willow was taking something in a cupboard when she spotted Buffy coming in.
“Hi Buffy.”
“Hey Will. Hey destructo girl.”
Kennedy creased her forehead strongly at Buffy calling her this, “Ok, on a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you hate me now, Buffy?”
Kennedy didn’t see Buffy smiling since the blonde girl still hadn’t moved closer.
“None.” Buffy slowly moved closer.
“No seriously Buffy, I’m sorry. God those pills got me all merry. And you know how I am then, I just keep saying everything that comes to my head, I’m sooo sorry.”
“It’s cool, I’m telling you, don’t worry about it.” Buffy started to put a mug on the table for herself.
“But I feel kinda bad, I’m the one telling you it’s serious and-, oh my God!”
Kennedy got up all of a sudden, regretting this as soon because it hurt her stomach, but she kept gazing straight into Buffy’s eyes nonetheless, “Oh my God!!” She repeated even louder.
Willow frowned and Buffy feared Kennedy’s next words.
“You did it!!” Kennedy let a laugh out, ”She did it?! They did it?!” She said looking at Willow who frowned, “No, come on, she did not-, Buffy?”
“Err, well.”
“Oh come on, Buffy, no.”
Buffy looked bad then, “But Will, I thought you said I was, I mean Faith and I we were... I mean I thought you’d be ok with it.”
“Yes of course I am, but couldn’t you wait a little? I just lost twenty bucks cause of you.”
Buffy’s eyes widened when Kennedy stretched out her hand and Willow gave her two 10 dollar bills.
“God I can’t believe you two bet on me.”
Kennedy sat back on her chair, “Right, like it’s the first time?”
“Thanks, you two are such great friends.”
But Buffy couldn’t help but smile at her two friends, she frowned as she looked at Willow then, “You thought I wouldn’t do it?”
Kennedy held back a laugh and Willow stared at Buffy,
“Buffy honey, the minute you two stepped into the house I knew it was going to happen. I didn’t know it’d be that soon though. 4 to 8 days I said.”
“And I said 2 or less. I won!” Kennedy raised her hands in victory.
Buffy looked a bit sceptic, “But it’s not... it’s not a game, I mean. Do you, does it really? I mean I didn’t know it was going to happen, I mean... It wasn’t horniness, right? Cause it didn’t feel like it, I mean, how could you know?”
“Buffy, it was anything but lust, and that’s how I knew. When you stepped in, it’s like the two of you were connected even when you weren’t looking at each other; it was a totally different level. I’d say it’s even non human level but then... you’re slayers so I wouldn’t be too surprised if you guys invented a new thing there cause you and Ken do that already. But with Faith... It was like a never ending talk, a never ending bond all along... I can still feel it right now even though she’s upstairs.”
Kennedy smiled, “She’s still sleeping?”
“Yes.”
Kennedy smiled even more, ”Boy I bet you really tired her out, didn’t you?”
“Right, I think I’m gonna go back upstairs now.”
“No, come on, come on, I won’t say anything, or I’ll try.”
Buffy smiled, ”No but anyway, Cassie’s awake. I mean, it looked like she fell back asleep in bed with Faith but she was hungry before that so... I don’t want her to wake Faith up. She really needs to rest.”
“You bet she does.”
Buffy lightly tapped Kennedy on the shoulder.
Kennedy looked up at her, “And hey, when am I finally gonna see that kid who’s supposedly the cutest child ever?”
Buffy smiled and walked away.
“What? What did I say?”
Willow laughed at Kennedy and bent loser, “Cassandra was in Faith’s arms last night when they stepped in the room.”
“No she wasn’t.” Kennedy then sighed, “God I was so out of it. I hate those pills.”
Willow smiled and sat again.
“So, Will, when am I gonna know about Faith and Wood, what’s the big deal?”
“This will be interesting to know, indeed.” Giles said as he stepped into the room.
“Yes but, I think Buffy’s coming back downstairs in a minute. I think she probably wants to tell you, or Faith herself, I don’t know.”
“But you do know right?” Ken asked her.
“Yes, Buffy told me, mind-told me while Faith was feeding Cassandra last night. She didn’t want to embarrass Faith so she used our secret talking mode.”
“Ok.”
Buffy wasn’t surprised to find Cassandra awake when she stepped into the room.
The young girl was sitting on the bed and playing with her new teddy bear. Faith had one hand on Cassandra’s little thigh.
Aunty B. Momma sleeping.”
“Yes, yes she is sweetheart.” Buffy whispered.
She knelt beside the bed, she couldn’t help but caress Faith’s face. The brunette lightly moved but didn’t wake up. She hadn’t been sleeping well in a long time.
“God she’s so beautiful. Just like you, little princess.”
Cassandra smiled brightly.
“Hey, what do you say we let mommy sleep and we go eat the pancakes. Good pancakes.”
“Good pancakes. Chocolate?”
“Yes sweetheart. Honey, chocolate, anything you want.”
Buffy lifted Cassandra off the bed then put her to her feet. Cassandra looked back at Faith.
Buffy took her hand, “Mommy will come very soon to eat pancakes too, sweetie.”
Cassandra took her teddy bear on the other hand and followed Buffy out of the room. Cassandra didn’t let go of Buffy’s hand when she was downstairs with ALL these strangers around. She didn’t stay shy very long though, mostly when Kennedy made her some huge honeyed pancakes and Willow chocolate ones.
Buffy laughed at how the two girls kept battling to feed her. Poor kid could barely eat a full pancake already. Well, she would eat more if they let her but it was a bit too much.
While Kennedy and Willow were feeding her, Buffy explained Giles the situation. She was on the other corner of the room so Cassandra, too busy eating and laughing wouldn’t get anything of what she was saying, but Kennedy and Willow could hear her.
Faith woke up almost an hour later. She shut her eyes tightly before opening them. She took a deep breath as she could smell Buffy’s scent all over. She took a deep breath. She then, as an automatism, directly checked on Cassandra’s bed.
Faith sat up immediately, “Cassandra??”
She got up, ”Cassie baby?” She sounded a bit panicky.
She put on the jeans and shirt that were here for her in less than ten seconds and she was out of the room, running to the stairs, “Cassie?!”
Faith finally released her breath when she heard her daughter laughing. Faith continued walking down the stairs more slowly then. She had to take a deeper breath at the sight in front of her.
Buffy was sitting on the floor in the living room. Cassandra was sitting in between her legs and they were drawing on papers with color crayons and laughing.
Cassandra kept talking to Buffy and the slayer always had something to respond and make her laugh, even if she didn’t always understood what Cassandra was saying since the kid’s words didn’t always make sense.
It was funny to watch.
To Faith it was more intense than intense to watch and she had to take a deeper breath again seeing how good Buffy was with Cassandra, how good she felt right now with this sight in front of her.
She swallowed then.
She gave a slight jump when she felt Kennedy’s hand on her shoulder.
“Cute picture huh?”
“Oh hey, Ken. Yes, cute. Err, are you feeling better?”
“Yep. Sorry about last night. The meds and all.”
“It’s ok.” Faith told her with a smile. She then looked back at the two girls playing. She looked a bit more somber then. Kennedy observed her.
“No need to wonder anymore.”
“Huh? I mean, what did you say?”
“Well, I look at you and I think I know what you’re thinking but there’s no hesitation to have. This is your station to get off, Faith.”
Faith looked away a little as Kennedy pointed out Buffy.
“This girl is everything you need, everything Cassandra and you need. There’s no need to look further; she’s the one.”
Kennedy started walking away but Faith turned around, “What if... I’m not the one for her. What if I’m not what she needs?”
Kennedy moved closer with a smile, “Well, she may have told you or not but I kinda dig this girl more than anyone else in the world, sort of, in a non crushing way, don’t worry. So anyway, the thing is, if you weren’t; I’d be kicking your ass out of here. But I know her well enough. And the look in your eyes when you saw them right about now... Tells it all to me, and I’m never wrong. So don’t let her go. This is not the kind of love you ever let go...”
Kennedy walked away.
“Mommy!!” Cassandra spotted her mother and ran to her.
Faith lifted her and made her fly in the air for a brief moment before holding her tight, giving her a big kiss.
“How’s my little princess?”
“Auntie B can’t draw.” Cassandra gave her mother the drawing she had in hand with a smile.
Buffy was already up and walking towards the mother and daughter.
“You did this, B?”
Buffy nodded ashamedly, “I always sucked in drawing classes. But you should see Giles’ drawing. So much worse.”
The slayers stared at each other with a somewhat shy smile as Buffy stopped beside Faith.
“How are you feeling?”
“Good, better. I slept well. You?”
“I’m really good.”
Faith meant to reach for Buffy’s face but held it back, “Wow, Giles really has good taste I must say.” She changed topic by checking on the clothes Cassandra was wearing.
“Yes I think so too. Err, I gave her a bath after breakfast, she was kinda messy so... I don’t know if it’s ok?”
“Sure it is, thanks, B.”
“No problem. It was rather fun, except that I had to change clothes after that. She really likes water.”
Faith couldn’t help but smile, “She got you wet, huh? Definitely my little girl.”
Buffy blushed and this time Faith couldn’t resist caressing her face. Buffy took a deep inhale and closed her eyes as they were about to kiss.
“Oh hello Faith, glad to see you’re awake.”
They both pulled away at Giles coming into the room.
“Hi Giles. Err, yes, I kinda slept in. I was a bit tired but I’ m good now.”
“I’m glad you’re feeling better. I was hoping we could talk a little if you’re up to it.”
“Yes of course.”
Faith put Cassandra back to her feet and smiled when the young girl ran back to her drawings on the floor. Buffy sat on the floor beside her but focused her attention on Giles and Faith. He gestured for Faith to sit on the couch. He sat in front of her.
“Buffy explained me your situation.” He slowly said, gauging her reaction but as he thought, she didn’t seem upset about this. She was expecting Buffy had.
“So I thought we might talk about what you’re going to do now. I mean, I believe she did the right thing, bringing you and Cassandra here, but now you need to plan your next move.”
Faith raised her eyebrows a bit defeated, ”That’s it, I don’t really have a next move. I don’t have that many choices, you know.”
“Actually you do, but the best scenario, if you want my opinion, is the one where you come back with the council, with us.”
Faith glanced at Buffy then back at Giles, “I guess I’d kinda like that. Mostly with you running the council now, it must be a totally different deal.”
“It is. And we definitely need someone like you there at the academy.”
“I know you’re trying to help but you don’t need to adorn things that much, you know. I’ve never been the best role model as a slayer, I know that.”
Giles stayed serious, “I’m not adorning or lying. I’m telling you what I think.”
“Well, then, thanks, I guess. Back to the topic anyway, as much as I’d like that for me, my main priority is and always will be Cassandra. She’s what I think about first.”
“So do I. You will never be sent to code red mission or-“
“No, no, not looking for special treatment or anything, not what I meant bu-“
“This is what I mean Faith. I don’t intend for this child to grow up without her mother. You will not be sent on dangerous, well, highly dangerous mission. You’ll never go on patrol alone.”
Buffy and Faith glanced at each other with a knowing gaze at this.
“I know what you meant Faith but there will always be someone at the academy to take care of Cassandra. You will be able to provide for her and you as well because you will be paid for doing your duty of course, but mostly... and this is what I had in mind, what I think would be a great thing for the academy. Having you supervising some classes and trainings with the new slayers, talking with them. It’s lesser risks for a mother and mostly... I believe those girls need you. They’re surrounded, they’re protected, they’re taught, they’re accompanied in their awareness of who they are but... they’ll never get to the level you and Buffy have achieved. These girls have never been in real life or death situations, not the way you two have been. Situations when you have to improvise, when you’re back against the wall, faced to death, with no weapons, no plans, no back up, nothing but you. Buffy’s... Buffy’s been in these situations enough for one lifetime but... and she won’t contradict me, she’s not good at sharing any of this. She’s not a people person if you prefer.”
Buffy smiled and watched over Cassandra then. Indeed, she didn’t disagree.
“Contrary to what it seems, she’s really not. She’s been lonely for too long in this job and the memories of those life and death situations, everything about Sunnydale, about her calling. Everything for her gets too emotional, too intense, too personal to use it as teaching stories, to share it somehow... But you, Faith; you have, you had back then a way to connect with these girls on a more friendly, personal level, and I think this is what they need to have a chance to maybe understand what it is that make them different.”
“Well, I guess B and I have different ways, yes.”
“And that’s why I believe your place is with us. You and Buffy complete each other in a very peculiar way I must say, but this is exactly what we need. I really think the two of you would be so beneficial for these girls.”
Buffy glanced at Faith with a smile while Cassandra got up and started running around the couch.
“So, err, all slayers are over there now?”
“No, really not. Only the ones in trainings, the new ones we found. See, when we find a slayer, she’s explained everything and she’s given the choice; she can either fulfil her destiny or keep living her life the way she previously was. Some come with us for a good training then go back and do both, daily and nightly life. Some just refuse but we keep contact with them all the same. Some of them later contact us years later when they realize they want to know more about themselves. And some stop and leave the academy after a while to go back home and live their own life. It’s somewhat really free. But we’re in contact with all of them, more than a thousand now. We keep contact in case of THE big emergency, big apocalypse like the one that destroyed half of Los Angeles for example.”
Buffy and Faith looked at each other; yes, that apocalypse. Angel wasn’t known for doing things in a half. His team neither.
“Honestly Giles that sounds.... I never even meant to stop in the first place, you know, so... I think I’d really like to go back with you... But, I mean, Buffy told you right? I can’t... I’m kinda tied, I’m...” Faith looked at the floor then.
“Yes, Buffy told me the entire situation and I meant to talk about this as well with you. We-“
They were interrupted by a big bang soon followed by Cassandra’s loud cries.
Faith was by her side immediately. She picked her off the floor on which she’d fallen and into her arms, “Hey baby, gotta watch where you’re walking.”
Buffy moved closer, almost worriedly at how loud Cassandra was crying, she sounded like she’d been torn an arm apart. But Faith very soon glanced at her that it was nothing and kept her casual and quiet tone.
“There, booboo there?” Faith rubbed Cassandra’s chin and placed a few kisses on it, “Wow baby see that? It’s still working, bravo Cassie, you didn’t break a teeth this time. Yay you!!” Faith cheerfully told her and Cassandra giggled at her mother’s words.
“There’s my baby. So what did you eat in your little tummy that you’re so heavy suddenly. Pancakes I bet, huh?”
“Chocolate pancake!”
“I knew that.”
Cassandra giggled even more as Faith rubbed her belly very fast.
Buffy moved closer to Giles, ”See what I was talking about? He can’t take her away, Giles.”
Giles put his hand on Buffy’s shoulder, ”Don’t worry, Buffy. He won’t.”
Giles moved closer, ”Faith. Let’s talk about Robin a little.”
Faith looked a bit less happy but nodded.
PART 9
Faith put Cassandra back onto her feet and the young girl started running again in the house. Buffy was amazed at how fast kids could get over what seemed to be the end of the world a minute ago with cries so loud she could wake up the entire area. And now the little girl was laughing and currently stepping on Kennedy’s leather jacket. Buffy had to intervene before someone else got so loud she would wake up the entire neighbourhood too with her furry. She loved her leather jacket...
Buffy took Cassandra’s hand and she followed till they reached their drawing place on the floor. Buffy put her arm around Cassandra who resumed her scribbles.
Faith was back sitting on the couch. Giles smiled at Buffy then and turned his attention back to Faith too. Buffy observed them closely of course.
“So, where were we?”
“To the part where I’m kind of stuck with him.”
Giles smiled, “You’re not stuck.”
“Well, she’s his daughter too. So that’s pretty much a deadlock for me. We’re not even married; I have nothing to put in the scale in court. I can’t even try my luck on that one cause from what he said, judges will like laugh at me or something. He’s like the good citizen and I’m the ex murderer. I don’t carry a lot of weight, according to him it’s like I won’t even count if we go to a judge for Cassandra’s custody. And it’s my daughter we’re talking about here so I... sorry but... I won’t even take the chance, I can’t lose her.”
“Faith, I understand your worries but... Robin doesn’t have all the answers, all the keys in hand.”
Faith straightened up on her seat, “What? Do you mean like, he lied or something? I could keep her?”
“No, he didn’t lie. The way things are now, if it came to court, I’m fairly certain you wouldn’t stand a chance.”
Faith looked upset but Giles went on, “So I understand it’s easy for him to pressurize you with this. But the thing Robin doesn’t know is that he’s not dealing with you anymore; he’s dealing with the council. If you come back, you’re a part of the watcher’s council and become indeed much more powerful than you are on your own.”
“What... do you mean exactly?”
“I mean that we have resources, that it is money, lawyers, and various other means to pressure him in return.”
“You’re not talking about... killing him, right? No cause, he’s Cassie’s father and things really went to Hell but he wasn’t a bad man. Things haven’t been easy but he’s... and he was a good father I mean I can’t-“
“Faith, Faith,“ Giles stopped her with a smile, “This isn’t the council’s ways anymore. I have no intentions on harming Robin, but I think I can speak a language that he’ll understand.”
Faith raised her eyebrows, “Careful, he’s pretty strong, you know.”
“I’d noticed.” Giles said with a brief gentle touch under Faith’s bruised lip. Faith looked away, still a bit ashamed about this.
“And no, not my methods either. You’re the slayers, you’re the ones who fight with fists. I use other means, but he will come around to our ways of thinking, I’m fairly certain.”
“What are you going to tell him, cause he can be pretty stubborn, you know.”
“I’ll figure something. In the meantime what can you tell me on his habits, on, well, anything that could work against him.”
“Oh you mean like...”
“Buffy told me you mentioned something about him having an affair.”
“Yeah, an English teacher. I mean I know he was banging her a couple of months ago. I don’t know if it’s still going on. But what, err, are you like, digging dirt or something cause, sorry but... not the way I want to do this either. I’m sorry you two I... I know you’re trying to help but I don’t want Cassandra growing up with the knowledge her parents hated each other so much they dug all the dirt possible on trial and such. Besides, I’d still be the loser on that side, I may not have banged one of my students but I think I’ve done way worse.”
“A student?”
“Giles, I told you, give it up.”
“Faith, this won’t be made public, I can assure you. But I need to be convincing.”
Faith sighed, “I’m sorry. You must think I don’t really... Seriously I appreciate what you’re trying to do. I don’t want to look like I disagree with everything or... like those women who can’t walk away from their abusive man, I’m...” She sighed again.
Buffy left Cassandra colouring the sun blue and walked to sit close to Faith. She took her hand, “We know what it means, Faith. We’re not judging. But there’s no way this can go on. Do you want this to go on?”
“No, no, really not. I’m tired of fighting all the time and crying all the time.” She admitted.
Buffy caressed her face tenderly as she could indeed see tears in the back of them.
“I don’t want you to think that I... . I don’t love him, Buffy. This is the truth I swear.”
“I know, I know.”
Giles stayed silent, leaving them to their quiet close talk for now. He’d long stopped being surprised by things in slayer land; their obvious closeness wasn’t even the beginning of a surprise to him.
“All my life I’ve never loved anyone but 2 persons.... Really love. And they’re both in this room so believe me that I don’t want to go anywhere else.”
“I know, Faith, I really do know.”
“It’s just I don’t want to sound like I’m constantly defending him, you know. He’s been treating me like... but it hasn’t always been like that and I thought I could go along with it. Sure we always fought. It was hard; I don’t think he’d ever planned on having a kid in the first place but Hell so didn’t I, and he did just fine with it, just like I did. He’s always been a good father. We argued, we yelled mostly because, well I know I didn’t want to be with him and he knew that; now I don’t even know what he wanted anymore, what he does want. So, bad stuff ensued, but nothing unbearable. It really started to go to Hell when I started to take these classes to get my diploma, you know. I’d just found this quite steady for once job at the casino cause there was no way he would pay for my studies. He was firmly opposed to that. So, he started to get pissed all the time and...“
Faith sighed, “I didn’t understand why he reacted like that. If I got my diploma I could get better paid job and things would be best for us. We just didn’t have other ways to speak than yelling at each other and hitting each other, well, him hitting me since I can’t touch him. I don’t know why it fell apart that hard.”
“I do.” Giles said.
The slayers looked at him, “Graduating, getting steady jobs... all things that gave you more freedom. Freedom to leave him.”
“Yeah cause he likes me around so much.” Faith sarcastically said and sighed.
Giles didn’t reply. He just got up.
“We need to go see him. This afternoon even.”
“Really? What are we going to say?”
“Well, it’s best if you stay here today, Faith. You’ll stay at home with Cassandra. Buffy, Kennedy and Willow will come with me to get your and Cassandra’s belongings. And I will have a talk with him.”
Faith looked a bit worried.
Giles put his hand on her shoulder on his way out of the room, “Don’t worry. Everything will go fine.”
“I’ll tell the girls we’ll go after lunch.”
Giles left the room.
Faith sighed, clearly anxious.
“You heard him, it’s gonna be ok. It’s Giles; he’s never wrong.”
“Yeah, except for that one time where he tried to off Spike, oh and also that time he kicked you out of your house.”
Buffy smiled despite the memories, “First, he didn’t kick me out, he just... didn’t try to get me to stay in.”
Faith raised her eyebrows at Buffy who smiled, “But I believe someone else did.”
“Yep, didn’t work though.”
Buffy put her arm around Faith’s nape, “Well, I hope this will work. Faith, please, I don’t want you to leave this house. I want you to stay with us.”
They stared at each other, their faces inches away until Faith moved closer to kiss Buffy softly.
They pulled away. Faith caressed Buffy’s jaw line, “Are you really serious, Buffy. I mean this thing between you and me, do you really... Is it really what you want?”
Buffy smiled, “I’m quite certain it is.”
Buffy moved closer and they kissed more deeply this time.
Cassandra went running to them then to show them the beautiful countryside drawing she’d made.
Buffy pulled her up to sit on her lap while Faith admired how rebellious her daughter already was. Nothing in her drawing had the color it’s supposed to have; sun, wheat, cows or was it a horse. And the people were green. Maybe that was an alien countryside.
Faith showed it to Buffy and they smiled, “It’s pretty, I kinda want to go live there.”
Cassandra returned her attention to her drawing, talking though for once none of the slayers were listening since they kissed once again until they heard the sound of a picture being taken from behind them.
“Sorry, was just too cute.” Kennedy told them as she pulled her cell phone back in her pocket then she left.
“God I hate when she does that.”
The blonde slayer looked at Faith, “Promise me you’ll never let her show you any of the pictures she has on me. Too compromising.”
Faith couldn’t help but smile, “Compromising huh?”
They smiled at each other then Faith looked back at Cassandra, with a smile too. But she was still very anxious, that showed.
Faith wasn't very hungry for lunch. She walked out in the garden immediately after it since Buffy seemed to be having a really good time feeding Cassandra.
All this was a bit confusing all the same. Watching the woman that she'd loved for so long taking care of her sweet daughter…. After all they'd been through, it was still very disturbing for Faith to believe it was happening, to believe things had changed, so much.
To believe she could really have a second chance.
Admittedly, she still didn't think it could happen.
"Thoughtful much?"
Faith gave a slight jump then moved closer to Kennedy who was a bit spread on the swing seat, smoking a cigarette.
"Hey Kennedy. What are you doing here? Thought you were getting ready to go with the others."
Kennedy held out her pack of cigarette to Faith who took one.
“Thanks.”
"Well, I’m hiding. Buffy doesn't really like me smoking."
Faith smiled as she lit her cigarette, "She's right, you know."
Kennedy smiled.
Buffy walked out, "Faith have you seen- ok, who pulled out the first cig? Cause believe me, that someone is in for a good spanking."
Faith and Kennedy briefly looked at each other before both raising their hands very fast. Buffy couldn't help but smile and they laughed slightly.
"No but seriously, you two shouldn't be smoking."
Faith started laughing then when Buffy took the cigarette Kennedy handed her and took a puff from it.
"You two are quite a pair." Faith told them.
Kennedy winked at Buffy.
Buffy then faked offence, "I'm only an occasional smoker."
"Hey, same for me." Kennedy protested.
"Well, I'm a very occasional smoker then." Buffy went one more.
Faith smiled then she noticed the two of them were looking at her,
"Oh, same for me. I kinda quit when I had Cassie. I decided to stop during the pregnancy with more or less success, I'll give you that, but as soon as she was born it was... I haven't smoked a single cigarette in her presence, that's for sure, or anywhere indoor with her."
"That's cool. I don't understand parents who aren't able to stop for their children; it should be the best motivation ever. But anyway…" Kennedy breathed out a last puff and handed it to Buffy who finished it.
Willow walked out, she raised her eyebrows briefly, "Ok, we're ready."
Faith tensed. Kennedy was already up.
"Let's go then."
Buffy held the younger slayer’s arm, "Ken, remember; we go, take their stuff, we don't talk to him at all, ok?"
"Yeah yeah, sure."
"I'm serious, Ken. Giles is going to be really pissed off if you don't do as planned, again."
"No problem. I'll be the best watcher's pet ever."
Kennedy walked back inside the house after Willow.
Buffy seemed worried.
"Is there a problem with Kennedy?"
"No, no, well, she's… not usually very following of Giles’ orders. Good thing he has some expertise with us already but, well, don't say that I told you but her father was alcoholic and he used to get a little tough with her mother. Kendall called the cops on him once and their mother threw her out of the house. Kennedy wanted to leave with Kendall but her parents refused until the day she tried to defend her mother and got a broken arm and collarbone out of this, she was 16 then. The whole thing went to court, Kendall and her father helped her and she was emancipated. Her parents got divorced following this. It's a sore topic because their mother died in a car accident two years ago and Kendall and her never made up before this, and Kennedy was only talking to her once in a while. Also I know Kennedy feels guilty because she never said anything before Kendall but it was her father, you know… She was only thirteen at the time it happened, Kendall was 20. It's normal Kendall made that move and not her. But still, she feels guilty."
"I see."
"But it's ok. She's ok, she's just very protective of the people she loves, her family, the slayers, all a big family to her and she's, well, she reacts with passion more than reason sometimes. But hey, not like we didn't know how this works, she's just a bit younger and less sensible than we are now."
"Right, and isn't it you who punched Robin last night?"
"Well, most of the time I'm more sensible now. But hey, it was about you. How could I…"
They stared at each other.
Faith smiled but then looked tensed again, "Maybe I should come with you."
"Don't worry, everything will be fine. It's best if you stay here. And you should hurry now, Cassie wants her mommy."
They walked inside and the group left.
Faith decided to go downtown with her daughter. Nothing better than keeping Cassandra busy to get her mind off of the situation. She took her to the merry-go-round, and to a puppet show.
Giles knocked at Robin's door.
Kennedy suggested breaking it open when no one responded.
Giles knocked again and shortly after Robin finally came to the door.
He had a beer in hand and Kennedy raised her eyebrows, "Right, perfect cliché."
"Kennedy." Giles just said.
Kennedy sighed.
"What do you want?" Robin told them rather sternly.
"We just want to talk."
"Right, and the cavalry’s just to have an audience?"
Giles gave him a nice smile, "The girls are just here to bring Faith and Cassandra some of their stuff. They need them."
"The only Faith needs to bring is her ass back here, with my daughter. And faster than this."
"Or you'll do what?!" Kennedy said as she pushed him inside the house.
Buffy stepped after her to prevent her from moving closer to him again.
"That's it I'm calling the cops. You people have no right to come into my house. You're keeping my girlfriend and my daughter away from me, it's not legal. Who do you think you are? You're in big trouble believe me."
"Yes do that, call the cops and tell them how you beat on your girl."
"Kennedy stop!" Willow tried.
"Kennedy."
"How dare you people, come into my house and judge me, you don't know anything about me or how I treat Faith and how she treats me back. It’s not Sunnydale anymore, you don’t rule, so just get out my house now!" He pushed Kennedy towards the door.
"I know how you treated her you bastard!" Kennedy pushed him in return.
"Kennedy!" Giles yelled. Buffy and Wood started yelling at each other too when she stopped him from moving threateningly towards Kennedy.
Giles and Willow were trying pointlessly to make themselves heard in all this yelling when suddenly a thump resounded. Wood found himself sitting on his couch.
"Fine!" Kennedy yelled from upstairs while slamming the bedroom's door in which she and Buffy had been magically sent by Willow.
Giles gave her a thankful gaze and she walked upstairs quietly.
Robin sighed.
Giles walked quietly towards him.
PART 10
Giles stood a few steps away from him.
"I’m very sorry about that. I was hoping it wouldn't go this way. I sincerely just wanted to talk to you but they really need their clothes and personal belongings, mostly Cassandra."
"They wouldn't need it if they were here."
Giles nodded to himself. He sat on a chair close to the armchair Wood was on.
"We really need to talk about the situation."
Robin drank a mouthful of his beer without replying.
"You don't have a lot of options Robin."
"Oh I think I do. If she thinks she can leave me like that and take my child with her. The law is with me and you know that."
Giles smiled but stayed nice, "You can try but it won't work."
Robin frowned.
"Those threats can, quite rightly, scare Faith, but you can't scare me with this. You can't scare the council with this."
"It's none of the council's business."
"Actually it is. Faith is a slayer. She's coming back with us, Robin."
Giles wasn't surprised by the look he saw on Robin's face though the black man looked away then.
"You're not dealing with a 27 woman completely scared of losing her child, you're dealing with a powerful institution that will burn you down if you try any legal action against Faith."
Wood stared at Giles, speechless somehow at how quietly he'd threatened him just right now.
Robin sighed, "I'm in my right there. You can't come here and launch threats like that. You're not God."
"Never pretended too but a saint you aren't either."
Robin stared at him.
"Buffy witnessed your abuse of her. Besides, if it comes to this, Faith will have no choice but to testify about life with you. And as much as Faith's past works against her, I don't think the jury will like very much to learn that the principal of the town's best high school happens to sometimes sleep with teachers, and occasionally with seventeen year old students."
Robin half smiled, "Right, I should have known she'd do something like this. If this is the way she wants to go, how will the jury react when they'll know she had sex for money, she slept with her manager for a job? Or I caught her giving our plumber a blowjob in the basement. The list is very long Giles so if this is what she wants, I'd happily enumerate it to the judge."
"This is absolutely not what she wants. I had to work her hard for her to give me this piece of information and she wasn't prolific on details."
"Again, because she knows whatever I did, she did worse."
"All Faith ever cared about was Cassandra. How all this might ruin her life. She insisted that there would be no dirt digging because she doesn't want this for her child. But tell me Robin, are you thinking about Cassandra?"
Robin looked at his beer.
Giles gave him a nice gaze,
"She doesn't love you, Robin, and she never will. You can lock her in this house forever if you want, this will never change. All you'll succeed to do is make three people unhappy."
"What exactly are you coming to with all of this, Rupert?"
"I'm just telling you that I know why you've made it so hard on her, why things couldn't go any differently than how they went. You're in love with her, but you know you can't keep her. You know you'll never have her. The strongest bond, and shall I say the only bond you have with her is through Cassandra. This is why you clung so hard to her."
"So now you're telling me I don't really love my kid?"
"Not at all. You love her I know that. But I also know this isn't the life you'd planned. This isn't the life you were heading to. Brilliant man, getting out first of your class. Climbing high in the hierarchy pretty fast even if Sunnydale's special's circumstances enable this; you still did it. Promised to a brilliant future and look at you. Bitter man sitting in a couch drinking beer alone. And you know that even if she were here, you'd still be alone."
Robin swallowed and looked away.
"Faith isn't happy with this life but I know she's not the only one. But you're the only one who has the power to stop this. She will come back to us; this is where she belongs. You can't stop this. And we can go around it the hard way if you insist but… I think you're smarter than this."
"You can't ask me to give up on-"
"I'm not asking you for anything. I'm giving you perspectives and you will make, I believe, the right decision. We're probably going to stay here a couple more weeks during which you are totally invited to come see Cassandra at the property, under Faith or our watch as you'll understand of course. You can go spend as much time with her as you will."
Robin looked at him, "And what then?"
Giles could hear the girls talking a bit more loudly so they were about to come down soon.
"Then… Then they will move with us to Cleveland. This is where they belong. Cassandra belongs with her mother. You know you can't take care of her the way she does. And don't take this the wrong way but you don't want your daughter without Faith. It doesn't change the love you have for Cassandra but it’s them you want, not one without the other. So we can pretty much get you a house there, a work place but definitely not a new beginning. And I'm not sure insisting with this relationship is in the best interest of the three of you. But like I said, you're welcome at the house to talk about this and any arrangements you want to make. But I trust you to do what is best for them, if you truly love them. I believe you'll move on much better this way."
Giles got up as the girls’ voices were getting closer.
He moved close to Robin and put a folded paper on the desk beside him, "You're a wise man; you know you both deserve better than this. It's the best thing you can do."
Giles moved away as the girls came downstairs, the last thing he wanted was Kennedy to attack him some more. But the younger slayer went straight to the exit with her filled plastic bags in hands.
Giles knew Willow and Buffy had probably taken care of her fit and briefed her some more even if he doubted anything really ever stuck in her brain. How his two protégées could be so fond of her was still a mystery for him. His only concern however was that the academy runs smoothly and Kennedy was devoted to the slayer cause. She'd always been, from the beginning and she was by far the strongest of the newest slayers. She had extra training and advises with Buffy but still… It always came more easily to her. So this was the reason why Giles hadn't lost his patience with her whims so far.
Buffy followed her fellow slayer out, hands full with Cassandra's bed, without giving Robin the slightest gaze either.
Willow walked after them as quietly as she'd gotten up there.
Giles came to her help and took the small bicycle she was holding with difficulty.
"Thanks. We've got pretty much everything I think." She couldn't help giving Robin an apologetically, or rather a sad gaze. It was his daughter's items she was taking away, and despite it all she could understand that it wasn't easy for him to stay there and just let them do.
Giles turned around and put a card on top of the TV.
"This is our location and phone number. We'll leave you to your reflection now. You know where to find us when you've decided how it's going to be, or if you have any questions. You're welcome to come up there to talk about it."
Robin stayed silent as they walked out of his house. He took another mouthful of his beer. He sighed then and put his hand to his forehead, sadly. He stared a while at Cassandra's playpen that was still in the middle of the living room. He then took the paper Giles had left beside him and opened it…
~
Faith was still downtown when they came home. She'd left them a note so they didn't worry.
Faith and Cassandra came back no more than an hour after them.
"Hey you two, had fun?" Buffy said as she came to meet them.
Cassandra ran to Buffy who took her in her arms.
"The pony moved!! I was on the pony! I was on the pony!" Cassandra started laughing and so did Buffy with a questioning frown at Faith.
“There were ponies, donkeys, goats and sheeps outside of the fair. That guy let the kids sit on the ponies. He was extra nice with Cassie, she had a little ride. Something like 1 meter or something, but you can be sure she'll still be on it next week.”
Buffy tickled Cassandra's neck and the younger girl started laughing even more, "So, what else did you do with mommy?"
"I spun in the merry-go-round with mommy."
Faith watched Buffy walking away to the living room, taking Cassandra's jacket off in the meantime while talking and listening to the young girl's excited rant about this as if it was the most natural thing to do, as if Cassandra was her own daughter.
That was another disturbing thought despite the fact that Faith loved this sight. It was still… In a couple of days her life had changed so much… and she had trouble to think it could really change for the best like it currently seemed.
Optimism had long left Faith's boat and it was still hard to let this good feeling overwhelm her; she couldn't help thinking of the fall down. She smiled though as she heard Cassandra giggled again as Buffy had trouble to take her shoes off.
Faith walked closer, "Oh and which one of you was a miraculous mechanic in a past life?"
The girls frowned.
"My truck. I've seen it parked in the alleyway; how did you guys do cause even I couldn’t find what was wrong with it."
Buffy and Kennedy glanced at Willow and Faith nodded, "Of course, anyone able to repair that piece of sh-stuff must have magic fingers."
"Oh yes she does."
"Oh Ken please!!" Buffy faked being grossed out.
Kennedy couldn't help but laugh and Willow hid her blushing by going to the bureau to find Giles.
Kennedy got up and headed to Cassandra, "Hey little fury, wanna do better than the pony?"
Cassandra smiled hugely and Kennedy carried her and threw her high before catching her again.
Buffy put her hand to her forehead, afraid there was going to be a brunettes’ fight soon but Faith stayed quiet and Cassandra started laughing her lung out as Kennedy did it again. She held her under the shoulders and turned around very fast.
"Ken, Ken? Not too fast, she's 43 months old."
"Come on, she loves that."
Faith sat on the couch and watched them. Kennedy took Cassandra in her arms then, "Hey little fury, wanna know what's waiting for you in the kitchen?"
Cassandra nodded.
"If I'm not wrong, there is chocolate mousse for dessert."
"Chocolate!!"
Kennedy took a tone a bit more serious, "But the chocolate is only for the little girls who eat all their French beans first."
Cassandra looked perplexed.
"Are you a nice little girl who eats her beans?"
Cassandra nodded religiously.
Kennedy tickled her belly, "Let's go then."
And she made Cassandra fly one more time before putting her on her shoulders and walking towards the kitchen with Cassandra laughing out loud.
Buffy walked closer to Faith trying to gauge her reaction. The brunette slayer looked somewhat baffled.
"You know what, B?"
Buffy looked at her as she sat on the couch beside her.
Faith turned to look at her too, "I don't know who's more tiring, Cassie or Kennedy."
Buffy smiled, "Yep, she can be worse than a child. But you can be sure Cassie's always going to eat her vegetables with her. Brian and Nicky always do; that's Xander's twins.
"Figured."
Buffy could see the worried look back on Faith's face.
"So, how did it go?"
"I think it went well, except for the arrival, but that's just a detail. Giles said it went fine. True, he didn't give us any details; maybe he will tell you I don't know, but he didn't want to tell anything about their talk but they did talk. And you can trust Giles, you know."
Faith sighed. Buffy felt bad, there was no way to appease her worried mind or relax her. Well, there was one but- Buffy shook her head to take this out of her mind for now. This wasn't set either. As long as the situation with Robin wasn't set, Buffy knew that she couldn’t ask anything of Faith towards the two of them. And she could understand this.
This is why when Faith told her she thought it was better if she stayed alone tonight well, with her daughter of course, Buffy didn't insist or say anything about this.
Buffy spent the night in Kennedy's room as she'd told Faith to keep hers since Cassandra's bed and their clothes had been put in it.
Buffy had trouble to sleep that night. She got up around 2 and couldn't help but check on Faith and Cassandra. She wasn't surprised to see the brunette slayer still awake.
Faith was sitting on a chair close to Cassandra's tiny bed, with her hand on her daughter's sleeping face, caressing her gently while deep in thoughts.
Buffy moved closer to sit on the bed, "It's going to be ok, Faith."
"I never thought one could love someone like this. I never thought I could love someone like this."
Buffy put her hand through Faith's hair and caressed her gently.
Faith turned to look at her, "You blew me away once on that already, made me feel things I never thought I could."
Buffy stayed silent.
"But it's different. I don't mean to lessen what I feel for you, Buffy."
"No I understand, don't worry."
"You Buffy; there's just no one else I can love like you, I know that, but without you, I've been able to live. I am able to live even if I know this is without this passion, this fire inside. Even if I know I thought about you and missed you everyday. I could still live without you cause in a way... I never thought I could be anything else than without you. So I had to."
Buffy kept on caressing Faith's nape gently.
"But Cassandra she's…. I would just die if I didn't have her. I can't do without her. She's just too much of me. There wouldn't be any me left to live in fact if she was gone. I can't. I couldn’t."
"Believe me, Faith, you'll be there for her first day at junior high school, high school, you'll be there to scare her Prom date. You'll be there for graduation, you'll give her some nasty advises about frats in colleges, you'll be there to take her to her first job appointment… You'll be there for her wedding. You'll be there taking the first picture of your grand child… You will be there. And she will always need you to. She will always need you and I don't think anyone can not see that. He can't take her from her mom, not if he loves her; I believe he can't. We will find a way, Faith. But things are going to be ok."
Faith gave Buffy a nice smile, brief smile but nice one.
Buffy kept on caressing Faith's nape.
"She looks so peaceful."
Faith smiled.
"Does she always sleep so tight?"
Faith smiled even more, "Depends the moment but with a day like today and Kennedy's play time after dinner, wow, I'll be lucky if she's awake before I am. I hate to have to wake her up; she gets cranky then."
"Then you'll just let her sleep. There's just no pressure, even if you go to work or anything; I can watch her, you know that, right?"
"Yes, yes I know I can trust you with her, don't worry. But I took the week off anyway. I just can't let her right now; I can't help feeling like I might come back home and not find her, you know. It's like I'm even afraid if I close my eyes one minute she'll be…" Faith took a deep breath; the simple thought of it smashed her heart.
"Don't worry about this either, Faith. You know that no one can take her if I/we, cause I'm not alone, don't want it. And if it came to this, you know I'd do just what you would."
The slayers looked at each other and Faith pulled back to the bed to rest her head on Buffy's chest while still staring at Cassandra.
"It feels so good, so good to be close to you, Buffy. Honestly I… I also fear that if I go away you too might not be here when I come back and I'm… not sure I could handle that so well now."
Buffy put her arm around Faith's waist, "Sleep tight then, cause I'm not going anywhere."
They stayed silently watching at Cassandra sleeping for a while.
At some point they both fell asleep on the bed, close to each other.
PART 11
Faith was still as tense today as the day before.
They all tried to take care of Cassandra and act as if everything was ok to relax her, but they could feel how stressed she was.
Buffy did manage to get her out on a walk in a small wood nearby. They brought Cassandra with them. The young girl was running ahead of them and kept coming back to bring the various flowers or plants she'd torn out of the floor.
Buffy smiled, "She's unstoppable."
Faith smiled, "Yep, but at least I have no problem to put her to sleep at night."
"Do you know that she used the word prerogative earlier? And with the right meaning I must say. She speaks very well."
"When she wants to. And she got that word from that Britney Spears song from a couple of years ago." Faith said.
"At first I thought she didn't speak much, you know."
"Yes, she takes a little time but once her shyness wears off; God she's really unstoppable then."
"She's a nice kid, really. You've done a great job with her."
"Can't take all the credit, B. But anyway, I'm just really glad she caught up."
"Caught up?"
"She was a premature baby, almost 2 months. She was so small, so fragile. She stayed in hospital for 9 weeks. That's what sucked all the money I had left and more even. I was going there every break I had. When I wasn't working at night then I stayed with her, you know. I was working at three places at the same time. I needed money for her care. It was hard the first year and a half, she was a bit late. She started talking later, she started walking later but she’s really caught up with that now."
"What was her first word?"
Faith smiled, "Momma."
Buffy smiled too.
"Oh, B. Guess what her third word was?"
Buffy started to smile before even knowing.
"It was chocolate."
Buffy smiled even more.
"Well actually it wasn't chocolate as much as chlate but I was making a chocolate cake and she was lusting over the chocolate, so there were no misunderstandings. She loves chocolate more than I do. That's to say."
"What was the second?"
"Baby."
Buffy then looked at her, "When did she say daddy?"
"It was her fifth word."
"What was the fourth, and you tell me when I get annoying ok?"
Faith smiled, "It's cool. The fourth, well." Faith looked embarrassed, "It was fuck."
Buffy couldn't help a slight laugh.
"I try to say it less but… it's so hard."
"Oh just one more; I bet wicked's in the top ten, isn't it?"
Faith smiled, "9." She admitted with a smile.
They smiled at each other then Buffy gently took Faith's hand in hers and they walked quietly the rest of the way.
The rest of the day went by ok.
Cassie was indeed really tired and fell asleep immediately after her mother put her to bed.
Buffy did only just remind Faith that she was in the room across the hall if she needed anything; she didn't ask her if she wanted to change the sleeping arrangement, so as to not pressure her more.
It was almost midnight when Buffy walked out of Kennedy's room. The two of them weren't sleeping yet of course, they were talking and Buffy had bought Kennedy something from a store after the brunette had gone to the hospital and back to Cleveland to recover. With the perplexity that had been Faith's meeting, Buffy had forgotten to give it to her. So she'd meant to pick it up now; it was on the desk at the entrance of the room. She figured she wouldn't wake up Faith and Cassie. And she'd be able to check on them at the same time.
Buffy opened the door slowly without knocking and was half surprised to find Faith standing still beside Cassandra's bed. Faith was wearing only a t shirt but was obviously finding it hard to fall asleep.
Buffy realized she'd given the brunette a good jump by coming in.
She moved closer, "It's just me."
"Sorry." Faith told her before swallowing. She looked really bad. She was tired, physically, nervously… But yet unable to sleep.
Buffy moved closer and gently rubbed her shoulders "Hey, it's ok."
Faith was holding back her tears, "I keep thinking he's going to burst in any minutes with cops and take her away; I can't sleep, Buffy. And I’m so tired."
"Ssh." Buffy whispered as she held her tight.
"It's not going to happen, Faith. It's not."
Buffy felt the brunette's hands squeezing her tighter.
Buffy caressed the back of her head until they pulled away just an inch to look at each other.
"I promise you, it's gonna be ok." Buffy put all her determination and honesty in those words and then couldn't resist kissing Faith.
The brunette soon took the upper hand and deepened the kiss. She could never resist when it was Buffy. She wanted to devour her. And the blonde girl’s presence so close was the only thing appeasing her.
They soon landed on the bed and under the covers. Soon too their night clothes flew away in the room and they started making love passionately to each other, so needing of each other's warm embrace.
Buffy came under Faith for the third times that night. Faith let her finger buried inside of Buffy's heated core for about 5 minutes before any of them moved. Buffy hadn't left her grip on Faith's back. Faith's head was in the crook of Buffy's shoulder and neck.
"God I'm never going back from this, from you Buffy. Can't get enough of you."
Buffy smiled, contented. She caressed the brunette's back and placed a kiss on her temple.
Faith pulled away just an inch, "You need to tell me if you want me to move or switch, you know."
"I kinda like you where you are right now."
Faith placed a soft kiss on Buffy's lips, "Really?"
Buffy raised her eyebrows, "You sound surprise?"
"Well, I kinda like it on top but… people I’m with too. I know it's kinda bad to talk about previous lovers when in bed with a person but, Robin for example, he hated it. I mean me on top. I understand, it's been kinda like that with every man I’ve been with. Robin is the only that I let lead us in bed though. I could understand his need for superiority because of me being a slayer. I don't think he ever dealt with this, me being stronger than him. Honestly, Buffy, I think if I hadn't been a slayer, I doubt he would have ever hit me. I think unconsciously, the fact that I could handle it is a big part of why our relationship got so physical I guess, in the bad sense of the word, of course."
"It doesn't excuse it. But I get what you're saying. I think Riley never got over that fact either. As for at nights, he was always on top too. It makes them feel more secure about themselves as men, you know. I mean I think. Stronger somehow, or maybe it makes us look weaker and in need, you know; I'm not sure."
Faith kissed Buffy's lips once again and pulled away then, "Anyway I just… well, you don't have to play it my way, you know. We're on equal ground there so…"
Buffy raised her hand to the brunette's face to pull her into a deep kiss.
She pulled away then, "To tell the truth, it never bothered me too much to be under. As much as I didn't feel anything much with them, I mean, aside from what I was supposed to, with you I do… I felt your strength, yes I still feel it and… I like that feeling. It does make me feel weak but not in the bad way. Secure I should say… I love the way you take me Faith. I love the way you make me feel. It's something I'd never felt before… Feeling you above me, in me, all over me right now, like you are it's… I love that feeling to death. So I'm thinking… we got an arrangement there."
Faith smiled but then looked at Cassandra.
Buffy made her look at her, "Didn't mean to assume anything by saying this. I'm not pushing you, well, I guess I kinda am but-"
"I know. I know, Buffy."
"What I mean is that you have time, I'm not pressuring you."
Faith caressed the side of Buffy's face, "I don't want you to think I'm hesitating Buffy. Cause being with you is a decision I'd make in less than a breath. It's just-"
"I know."
Faith moved on the side so as to see Cassandra. The brunette was propped on her elbow therefore, caressing Buffy's collarbone and chest. She looked daydreamy.
"What are you thinking about?" Buffy said as she turned on her side to face her.
Faith smiled naughtily.
Buffy smiled, "Apart from that."
Faith smiled, "Well, just that it's strange, I mean funny maybe, no, strange."
"What is exactly?"
"You, me. Being here with you, naked, and please don't take this as a hint to put your clothes back on cause I'm getting so addicted to that sight right now." She said following her statement by a voracious kiss above Buffy's nipple.
Buffy smiled and took a deep breath.
Faith pulled away, "but more seriously, all this, Willow for example, the way she's treating me, it's like nothing bad ever happened. And everyone and everything. Giles has already told me about the way things work at the academy, like I’m already there, you know. Kennedy and Willow filled me in on Xander and his wife and the kids and everything. It's like I'm part of the group, for real."
"You are."
Faith smiled but returned to her deep staring of Buffy,
"But mostly, Buffy; You. Me and them, it was only superficial somehow. We weren't so close so I didn't hurt them the same way, and their reject didn't hurt me the same way either so I can understand that things can be casual again with them. But you. You and me… All that happened… And there you are, in my arms. I've made love to you the way I’ve always dreamt of. I've told you what I've always feared to tell you, you've told me what I cried at night about because I knew, I mean I thought I'd never hear it… I…. I think a part of me doesn't understand how you can forgive, or love me or… well, how it can be that way. I've always dreamt of that and my dreams aren't supposed to come true."
"Says who?"
"Life, my life. It's never come true."
"Hey; it did bring you a miracle 43 months ago, plus a goddess in bed tonight."
Faith smiled, "That it did."
They smiled at each other then Buffy looked at her, "You know what, it went away. I told you already, the pain, the hurt, the anger, the violence, the jealousy… It all went away. I think it all started right when Sunnydale collapsed. I know it took a lot of it in its ruins. I didn't realize it then but slowly it went away, still without me realizing it. And one day it was gone; I felt free. And for us, well, take away all I've mentioned… what is left then?"
Faith stared at her as Buffy caressed her face and whispered, "Love. Passion. Admiration as well. Desire and of course, the most perfect sense of complement... I'm sure I could find some more and they'd still be positive words. But love and passion mostly. That's what you inspire me, and that's how I feel for you. I feel so good, so quiet in the best way possible, like everything's in place, everything's where it's supposed to be… and I can tell about that because I haven't felt this way ever since I've been brought back to life. But with you, with you God knows Earth feels just like Heaven."
Faith stayed silent, somehow unable to come up with anything else. She had to take deeper breaths though. She caressed Buffy's face again and they moved closer to kiss tenderly.
Faith slowly moved forward.
"There you go, on top again." Buffy whispered naughtily.
“And you’re so going to like it again, B.” Faith replied teasingly as they started making love again.
Buffy's senses let her know she was being spied on. She opened her eyes and realised Cassandra was standing up beside the bed, beside Faith's sleeping body, looking at them quietly.
Cassandra smiled when she saw someone was finally looking at her.
"Faith." Buffy whispered.
Faith opened her eyes slowly, she was turned to Buffy so she smiled. She turned around though at Buffy's look.
"Hey isn’t that my little princess?"
Cassandra smiled hugely then, she stretched her hands "Mommy.”
“Want a hug." She added.
"Come here baby, give mommy a big hug."
Faith swiped her off of her feet with one hand and pulled her on the bed, in between her and Buffy.
Buffy looked hesitant, a bit uncomfortable,
"Maybe I should put my clothes on, or-or maybe go, do you want me to leave you, or-"
"No, please, stay…."
Faith settled Cassandra under the covers and Cassandra hugged her tight.
Faith smiled, "She sleeps with me sometimes, she likes that a lot. I try not to give her that habit too much but we do that occasionally."
Faith placed a kiss on Cassandra’s tiny mouth and Cassandra put her arms around her mother. Faith pulled her completely against her.
Cassandra smiled then she looked at Buffy, "This is my mommy." She told her with a bright smile.
"Yes sweetie, and you're very lucky. She's a good mommy."
"I love my mommy."
Buffy smiled. Faith held Cassandra tighter.
"So do I, Cassie." Buffy whispered.
The slayers stared at each other. Cassie laughed a little by herself.
"Do you have a mommy?" She then asked out of nowhere.
Faith knew Buffy felt sad at this but the blonde slayer didn't show it to the young girl.
"Yes I do, but she's not here anymore. She's gone."
Cassandra looked thoughtful.
"Gone? Where gone?"
"Somewhere kinda far. But she's really fine where she is."
Cassandra still looked a bit puzzled, but she smiled then, "You love my mommy?"
"Yes, I do."
"You can have her sometimes when you want a mommy… She's my mommy but you're nice and you're funny. I can give her to you sometimes."
Faith couldn't help but smile at that, so did Buffy.
"This is very sweet Cassandra. You're the kindest little girl in the world. If it was my mommy, I don't know if I would lend her to anyone."
Buffy winked at Faith.
Faith kissed Cassandra's cheek, "You're my sweet girl. So you don't mind if I give a kiss to Buffy too?"
Cassandra smiled and shook her head negatively.
Buffy wasn't too sure, she still felt a bit hesitant because of Cassandra but when Faith's lips touched hers, she couldn't help but respond to the deep kiss.
They kissed until they heard Cassandra giggle as she was watching them.
They pulled away, shyly for Buffy while Faith tickled her daughter.
Hearing the laugh coming from the room, that's the moment Kennedy chose to knock.
"Err, yes, come in." Buffy said, while pulling the covers up her body.
Faith, in her most non modest way, didn't much care about this. Cassandra was covering most of her chest though.
Kennedy popped her head inside and smiled at the sight, "Hey supergirl. Good thing I decided not to wait for you last night. I could still wait for my supposed gift while you enjoyed the pleasure of the flesh." Kennedy then checked Faith out, "Though I get why; that's some flesh."
Faith smiled at Buffy's look.
Buffy raised her eyebrows, "Remember that thing we said about you not having Faith?"
"Don't worry supergirl, doubt she wants anything else than what she's got in bed right now."
Kennedy winked at Faith.
"You got that right, brat girl."
The two brunettes smiled at each other.
"Ok, so, breakfast is ready if you want and also,"
Buffy and Faith listened attentively but Kennedy only pulled out her cell phone and took a picture of the three.
"Kennedy??" Buffy scolded while Cassandra laughed. She liked pictures’ noise.
"Sorry, you're just too cute. Will's coming, I think she has news. Well, see you downstairs."
Willow showed up and hid, "Oh sorry, I thought. Err, well, it's-"
"Red it's ok, you can come in."
"Really?"
"Yes, Will. Come in."
Willow stepped in just a little, "Ok, err, well, Robin called."
Faith sat on the bed and Willow blushed profusely at her naked chest, though she quickly looked away. Faith pulled Cassandra back in her arms though, holding her tight. She seemed tense again.
"He's coming this afternoon, just to see Cassandra. That's what he said. Sometimes after 4 he said."
"Thanks, Will. We'll be downstairs in a little while." Buffy said as Faith still hadn't said anything.
The brunette shook her head, "Err, yes, thanks Red."
Willow closed the door.
Buffy squeezed Faith's hand, "He's just coming to see her. And we'll all be here. Don't worry. Everything will be ok."
"Yes, I'm sure it will.” Faith said very low though her look on the side and her tone betrayed she believed the opposite.
She pulled Cassandra to her feet despite the young girl's pout at this, "It's time to go to the bathroom and then we're gonna have breakfast, ok munchkin?"
Cassandra's smile came back, "Pancakes, pancakes." She started claiming.
"We'll see about that."
Faith got up and put a shirt on then took Cassandra’s hand to head to the door.
"I'll see you downstairs, B."
"Ok."
Buffy lied down on the bed again. She couldn't really say Faith's sudden distance was a surprise. She couldn't stop the brunette from being tense and even afraid about that encounter.
Buffy though admitted she was rather eager to get to that moment.
One way or another, this story needed closure. Faith couldn't stay in that constant state of panic as soon as she thought about her situation with Robin.
Buffy was 2 hundred percent sure about what she wanted now: Faith. She was what she wanted. Faith, Cassandra, the whole package. Buffy had no doubts about this now.
And she wanted Faith completely, but there was no way Faith would give herself totally in this situation. So Buffy was rather impatient to see how it would turn out.
PART 12
Everyone could see how tense Faith was for lunch. Once again, she barely even ate. She mostly focused on helping Cassandra with her rice. She was very focused on her daughter, as if trying to get her mind clear of any other thoughts.
The others kept talking about casual light topics, then they all went away to their businesses.
Buffy walked upstairs after a while to see how Faith was doing. She knocked at the door and opened it.
She could see relief again on Faith’s face. Robin wasn’t supposed to come until much later but he could have changed his mind; that’s obviously the thought that had just crossed Faith’s mind when she heard the knock.
Buffy smiled reassuringly at her.
Faith lightly smiled then went back to arranging some clothes in the cupboards.
Cassandra kept jumping on her bed.
“Cassandra stop.”
Buffy moved closer, “Hey Cassie, not sleepy?”
Cassandra strongly shook her head negatively.
Faith sighed, “Kennedy promised her she’d make the pony for her and now-“
“Pony!! Pony with Kendy!!”
“See?” Faith said with a sigh while Cassandra jumped even more.
“No pony ok?! You go to sleep and stop that now.” Faith firmly said.
Buffy moved closer from the little bed in which Cassandra was now sitting with a sad grin on her face. Buffy gently stroke the top of her hair.
“It’s ok sweetheart.”
Faith swallowed and moved closer, she took Cassandra in her arms, “I’m sorry, baby. Mommy’s not angry at you. Mommy’s sorry. I’m sorry, princess.” Faith gave her a big kiss on the cheek. Cassandra looked far less sad already.
Buffy moved closer.
Faith frowned a little but let Buffy take Cassandra in her arms, “You know what, Cassie? You’re gonna go play with Kennedy for a while and when you’re tired, you’ll tell Willow ok?”
Cassandra nodded hugely.
“No, B wait.”
Buffy gave Faith a gentle look, “She’ll be safe, trust me. You need to relax Faith.”
Buffy opened the door, “Willow, Willow wait.”
Buffy walked out of the room and back inside thirty seconds later, without Cassandra.
Faith was sitting on the bed, head in between her hands when Buffy sat beside her.
“I never talk to her that way, or I try to. I always take it out on everything BUT her.”
“That’s why I’m telling you to relax. Cassie’s with the girls, she’s fine, and I’ll take care of you here.”
“Yeah?”
“I was making some herb tea downstairs, my mom used to make me some when I was sad or a bit edgy.”
Buffy got up to pick Cassandra’s teddy bear from the floor. When she turned around she was face to face with Faith, “In fact it’s a good thing you got her out of the room.”
Faith pinned Buffy against the wall rather firmly, “Cause I do other things when I’m edgy. I wouldn’t want her to see.”
Buffy gasped at Faith’s wild kiss in her neck. The brunette’s hand briefly massaged her breast before already heading south to the hem of Buffy’s pants.
“Faith?”
Faith pulled Buffy’s face into an angry kiss.
“God yes, I could use some relaxing.” She whispered huskily into Buffy’s neck while undoing the buttons of her pants.
“Faith wait.”
“No. Can’t. We don’t have lots of time. I gotta touch you. I gotta be inside of you again. I got to feel you.”
Buffy gasped when Faith’s finger found the right spot. It took the blonde girl all of her will to make Faith pull away.
“No.” Buffy said quietly but firmly.
“Buffy I-“ Faith stopped as Buffy took her face in her hands.
“No. You’re not going to fuck me right now because you think it might be the last time. This isn’t what we’re about. You’re going to let me be there for you the way you truly need it. And tonight... tonight you’ll be making love to me like you will every other night after that, because it’s meant to be this way.”
Faith swallowed, she tried to look away but Buffy kept her firm hold on her face. The blonde girl pulled her into a deep kiss when a tear fell from Faith’s eyes. Faith wrapped her arms around her and held her tight for a long while.
Buffy didn’t release her grip until Faith started to move.
It’s Faith who took Buffy’s head in her hands now, she stared at her for a while. Buffy smiled, knowing. Sometimes, lots of times actually, Faith’s gaze could be so much more revealing than any words she could say.
Buffy took her hand, “Now come with me, I’ll give you some of that herb tea, and maybe you’ll have a bit of rice too.”
They walked out of the room hand in hand.
Faith finally ate after Buffy warmed the rice for her. They sat in the kitchen for a while before going outside to the swing seat.
They saw Kennedy was cleaning some weapons while Willow was reading a magic book. Cassandra was beside on a small mat the girls had set there. The young girl was asleep now for her post lunch nap. And Faith could see how the two ex girlfriends kept checking on her.
Buffy gently rubbed Faith’s shoulder, “See, no need to worry.”
“Yes.” Faith told her but couldn’t help checking her watch. It was 3 pm.
“I wish Tina was here.”
Faith looked at Buffy with a frown.
Buffy gave her a gentle smile, “She always knows how to de stress people, talk to us and get us to relax. I know you haven’t really met her either but Tina reminds me of Tara in a way. She has that same soothing vibe about her.”
Buffy then smiled, ”In fact it’s weird, it’s a bit as if Willow and Xander had switched. Tina’s a lot like Tara and boy when you’ll meet Kendall you won’t be able to not think of Anya in some way. She’s usually really blunt and brazen, you know. Well, I guess they’re not sisters for nothing on that one, but Kendall’s a different deal.”
Faith took Buffy’s hand and they smiled at each other.
“Anyway, I’m sure you’ll like Tina, everybody does. She’ll be good to you. She has a way to make people talk, and you know you can be sure anything you tell her will stay between you two.”
Faith ran her hand along Buffy’s jaw line, “I’m sure. But I won’t need that. You’re the only one I wanna talk to, secret talk I mean. Besides, I’m fine with you. You soothe me, Buffy. It’s you I need.”
Buffy smiled, she moved closer and they kissed softly.
“I’m glad. I just wanted you to know there are lots of people who will be there for you if you ever need to, but yeah, I kinda like being on top of that list of people. If you let me be there, I will be.”
Faith smiled and put her head on Buffy’s shoulder.
They stayed for a long while this way.
Faith relaxed as much as she could but the tension grew fast again when 4 pm came.
They didn’t move though.
Faith wanted to freeze that moment somehow. Cassandra sleeping peacefully a couple steps away from her, and herself resting close to the woman she loved.
She didn’t know if she could handle this dream to go away. If she could handle putting Cassandra to sleep in her bed at Robin’s tonight and go sleep in their bedroom. Maybe have sex with him and pretend like she was going to be ok with it.
She felt mad somehow because those couple of days with Buffy made it harder for her, and she had to be strong, because if she had to go back she would go back.
But now she’d be just a living dead girl. Any bit of passion inside of her would stay in this house with these people, with Buffy. Now that she’d tasted that dream... anything else would be a living nightmare. But she knew she had to be strong, if that was what it took to stay with Cassandra, that’s what she would do.
Faith moved away from Buffy suddenly. Buffy stayed quiet.
“I think she’s waking up. I should take her back inside.”
Faith didn’t look at Buffy and somehow the blonde slayer understood what she was thinking about.
Buffy watched as Faith walked inside with Cassandra in her arms.
Buffy took deep breaths; she could feel that anxious knot inside of her too. She was both impatient and anxious about Robin’s arrival.
The girls walked back inside with Buffy.
Giles was going downstairs at that moment, “Kennedy?”
“Yes.”
“I need you to get a book from me at the local library.”
“What, you mean now?”
“Yes now.”
Buffy and Willow both looked at the floor briefly.
“But Giles... Err, can’t it wait?”
“No it can’t.”
Buffy was afraid Kennedy would enter in one of her famous rant that would always get on Giles’ nerve but instead she moved closer, “I’m sorry... about the other day. I shouldn’t have done that, should have followed your directives. It won’t happen again, I promise.”
Buffy was a bit surprised but Kennedy’s tone showed she was really sincere, not pretending to keep her head down.
Giles nodded, “Well... I suppose that book can wait till tomorrow then.”
“Thank you.” She told him.
He looked at the three of them, “I don’t want any of you to talk to Robin, and death stares aren’t really allowed either, understood Buffy, Kennedy?”
“Yes.” They both said.
“This is between them today.”
He then walked away to the living room in which Faith and Cassandra were settled.
Buffy walked to Kennedy, “My God you’re finally maturing.”
“Ah ah, very funny.”
Willow smiled, amused and the three girls walked into the living room.
Faith was too busy taking her mind off of her worries by playing with Cassandra that she didn’t hear the knock on the door a little after 5. Buffy was beside them and they were playing the three of them.
It’s Giles who welcomed Robin quite nicely.
Kennedy and Willow were in the kitchen when Giles stepped into it with Robin. Kennedy did her best to not look mean but seeing how hard it was she chose to look somewhere else. Willow politely told him hello.
“Do you want something to drink?” Asked the watcher.
“No, thanks. I’d just... If you don’t mind, I’d just like to see my daughter now.”
Willow gave him a sympathetic gaze at that.
“Of course.” Giles walked out of the kitchen and Robin followed.
Faith’s heart stopped beating for a second when they walked into the room. Buffy and she got up.
“Daddy!!” Cassandra ran to her father who carried her and held her tight, giving her plenty of kisses on the cheeks.
Buffy walked on the side to meet Giles and the two of them left, not before a brief knowing gaze to Faith from Buffy.
Robin walked closer to Faith with Cassandra still in his arms. He lightly ran his fingertips on the corner of her lip, still a little bruised from his punch. She looked away at this.
He then walked closer to where the three girls had been previously playing and he sat there for what seemed forever to the three nosy girls watching the scene from the window on the kitchen’s door.
Cassandra was in deep talking mode and Robin seemed like the most attentive audience.
Faith was watching the scene, both with pleasure and fear. She loved seeing that; even if those moments had gotten rare, seeing Cassandra telling her tales to her father had always been a pleasant scene. He’d always been a good father to her. Even if the pressure tended to grow harder on him and he had more trouble keeping his calm and his tone low to Cassandra than Faith did.
Faith stood against the living room large table watching them.
Robin was introduced to Bobby the teddy bear, then showed all the drawings Cassandra and Buffy had made together. Then he learnt that there were ponies on earth and that you could go on top of them and they would move.
Robin looked really quiet and amused.
“And then Kendy made the pony for me and then I bumped my head and cried and I was sad because Kendy said she was dead. But then she said it was ok and she gave me chocolate.” Cassandra told him with a bright smile.
Faith gave Kennedy a slight glance. Kennedy raised her eyebrows sheepishly. Willow had to ask for what Cassandra had said because only the slayers could hear from that distance.
Faith returned her attention to Cassandra and her father.
“So, you have fun here?”
“Yes!!” Cassandra enthusiastically said.
“What else did you do?”
“I ate pancakes!! And beans.” Cassandra grimaced a little at this and Robin smiled.
“I slept with mommy and aunty B in the big bed.”
“Aunty B?” He asked.
Faith started to get more tense.
“She’s really nice daddy. She doesn’t have a mommy anymore so I said she could have mine sometimes. She likes mommy a lot. And mommy said I was nice because I shared her, and she gave Aunty B a kiss because her mommy’s gone, you know and she’s sad.”
Faith swallowed as Robin looked at her.
Buffy was getting ready to burst into the room. But Robin just returned his attention to his daughter, he hadn’t looked shocked or angry or surprised.
Maybe he hadn’t understood it was more than a friendly kiss but the slayers somehow knew he had.
Back there in Sunnydale when they first met, even if Faith hadn’t let the talk get that far, he’d already noticed how much Faith truly cared about Buffy. And the first time they’d slept together, before that happened Faith had let him in on how freaked out she was and how much she wished Buffy was here. Faith felt somehow he’d always known, maybe that was why he’d reacted so badly at Buffy’s return. Maybe.
How was he going to react now...?
Faith’s breathing was getting a bit heavier with all those thoughts in head.
Robin whispered little things in Cassandra’s ears that made her giggle.
He took her under her armpits and held her up, looking at her, “That’s my little princess. You’re my beautiful baby. The most beautiful little girl in the world. You know it’s you, right baby?”
Cassandra giggled again then he held her tight against his chest then.
Faith frowned a little and stood up, she thought she saw a tear falling from Robin’s eyes but she couldn’t be sure.
Robin put her back on her playing mat, ”You stay right here baby, ok? Keep drawing pictures for daddy.”
“Yes daddy.”
“I love you baby.”
Cassandra smiled and was already drawing again as Robin got up.
Buffy felt nervousness at its peak as Robin walked to Faith. Kennedy put her hand on Buffy’s shoulder and squeezed it a little.
Faith swallowed but didn’t move as he stood straight in front of her. He put his hands on her face, caressed her softly. He pulled her into a gentle but deep kiss and she let him do.
Buffy swallowed but didn’t feel jealous, still very nervous though.
Robin stared at Faith then, “You’re so beautiful. Always been such a beauty.”
Faith tried to hold back threatening-to-fall tears. She took a deep breath. He wiped away the few tears that did escape from her eyes and then rested his forehead against hers.
“We could start over.” He whispered though he already knew the answer to that. She swallowed a couple of times.
“We can’t... I’m sorry. I can’t.” She told him, almost pleading somehow.
He looked at her and wiped some more tears away. He took a deep breath and stared at Cassandra for about ten seconds.
Faith felt her heart racing in her chest.
Robin looked at her very calmly strangely. She hadn’t seen him look this way in a long time. He placed a soft kiss on her forehead then moved away. He stopped at the small table a little further and pulled a paper out of his inner jacket.
It was the paper Giles had given him.
Faith, as well as the three girls, frowned at him pulling out a pen and writing on this paper briefly.
Robin stood up, looking at it for a short while. He turned to give a last look at both Faith and Cassandra before walking away silently. He walked out without looking at the three girls standing there a bit surprised.
They stood at the entrance of the living room then but didn’t dare to walk in as Faith hesitantly walked to the small table. The three girls saw her hand was shaking when she grabbed the paper and looked at what it was.
Faith swallowed, she looked almost pale. She let the paper back where it was and walked to her baby girl that she picked up the floor, holding her tightly while crying profusely.
Buffy, followed by the two other girls immediately walked to see what the paper was about, fearing the worse.
Kennedy smiled, very fast followed by Willow while Buffy’s vision somehow got blurry. She had trouble to believe what she was looking at. It was a legal paper giving Faith the whole custody of Cassandra. It was actually a paper from Robin giving up his paternal rights on her.
A smile finally reappeared on Buffy’s face as she looked at Faith and Cassandra. She walked to them with the paper in hand.
Willow and Kennedy chose to go back to their spying spot.
Buffy gently put her hand on Faith’s shoulder, not daring to interrupt her but Faith immediately pulled her into a tight embrace.
Cassandra looked a little lost as to what was happening. Why her mommy was crying so much but didn’t seem sad nonetheless.
“Mommy?”
“It’s ok baby. Everything is so fine baby. Mommy’s always gonna be here for you, you know that, right?”
Cassandra smiled and got another big kiss from Faith, followed by a big kiss from Buffy. She felt really happy right now.
Buffy squeezed Faith’s shoulder and Faith put her free hand on the blonde girl’s face, “God I love you.”
Buffy took a deep breath.
Faith looked at Cassandra, “Mommy’s never gonna cry again baby, and we can go play ponies with Kennedy every day now, do you want this?”
“Yes!!!”
“And Aunty B is going to take care of you baby. She can give you the bath, she can make you pancakes everyday. She can sleep with mommy and Cassie and take care of us both. She can make mommy and Cassie happy. Do you want Aunty B to take care of mommy and love mommy like I love you?”
“Aunty B.” Cassandra smiled and stretched her arms for Buffy to take her which she did.
The blonde girl held her tight, she felt so immensely good at Faith’s words.
“Cause I want to... More than anything.” Faith then whispered.
Buffy and Faith stared intensely at each other before getting into an intense kiss.
Kennedy and Willow watched the scene from the door step.
“God you slayers never breathe?”
“That’s the advantage. I do think they’re holding a record there though. God that makes me hot...”
“God me too. I mean, just makes me... want to go home.”
Kennedy sighed, “Dammit if you hadn’t broken up with me we could be up there doing just the same thing.”
“Hey you broke up with me, slayer.”
“Whatever. I’m so horny. I need myself a girlfriend. If only you weren’t dating my fucking sister I’d make you cheat tonight.”
“You would never do that.”
“Fine no, I wouldn’t but God I need a girl. Those two have been giving out such vibes lately it’s driving me crazy. And look at them; they’re gonna get some and me, none.”
Willow nodded sadly. They both stared at the scene once again as the kiss deepened and heat waves seemed to be going out of this room.
Kennedy walked out of the kitchen, taking her jacket, “I’m going out.”
She bumped into Giles who was coming in after hearing Robin’s car.
“Kennedy, where are you going? Is everything alright?”
“Yep, gonna find me a girl for the night. See you tomorrow.”
Giles cleared his throat at Kennedy’s blunt honesty. He walked into the kitchen, still eager to find out what had happened.
“Willow, is-“
“Sorry Giles.” She cut him as she was on her cell phone.
She smiled, #Hey baby, yes I’m missing you so much too.#
Willow walked upstairs whispering love words to Kendall via the phone.
Giles frowned again but decided to go see Faith and talk to her about what Robin and her had discussed.
Giles was about to step in the living room when he turned around abruptly, taking his glasses away at the sight of the two slayers sitting on the couch, heavily kissing, and groping, each other while Cassandra was drawing quietly on the floor.
“Right.”
He pulled out a handkerchief and walked upstairs, heavily cleaning his glasses.
THE END
Author’s note: I don’t usually do that cause I like my readers to have their own idea on how a story could go on once I’ve officially finished it, which is the case here. But I felt important, well, to me it is important to let you know that Robin doesn’t disappear from Cassandra’s life. He’s her father and it does mean something to me. So yes, Robin does stay in Seattle and starts his life again while the girls head back to Cleveland and form another family there. Cassandra will grow up to know Buffy as her ‘dad’ or rather her mommy B(is) lol. She will love her and know her much better than Robin, but he does visit her once in a while and ‘get news’.
Just thought I should detail this. This is how it goes in my mind. You can still imagine something else though. lol
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